Defiance: How to deal with defiance in children without punitive measures

Many parents have been there. A child defying the limits of parents. This is a common occurrence in American hones. Most parents think that their defiant child is out to "undermine parents". However, children do not defy parents for "undermining parents". They simply cannot accept a set limit.

God's Law on dealing with defiance in children is spelled out in Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child, including for defiance. However, it is not enough to simply stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing them altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone else's feelings, you need to apologize. It is no different when dealing with children. One thing that hurts children's feelings is not being able to accept a set limit. One expression of childhood displeasure for set limits is by defiance, usually coming in the form of forceful tears when the child hears the word "no". However, your children aren't out to get you. They simply cannot accept a set limit, with this due to children having poor control over their emotions. Whatever is simply disappointing to adults is earth-shattering to children. Thus, in order to avoid offenses in children, you need to apologize for hurting your child's feelings, ideally in the face of their defiance. One thing that hurts children's feelings the most is limits set out of anger. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating as "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Colossae as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by a child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

Defiance is a normal and developmentally appropriate behavior in children. Children lack emotional self-control, and this is the case until the age of 8. What is simply disappointing to adults is earth-shattering to young children. The idea is to give an apology in the face of the child's defiance. However, if you ever set limits out of anger, you need to apologize for hurting your child's feelings with your anger. 

Children never intend defiance as a means of "undermining parents". Instead, they simply cannot accept set limits. Most children go through moments where they are acting defiant. The key is to give an apology for having to set limits that the child does not like.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

"Biblical spanking": Why the rod verses in the book of Proverbs are repealed verses

Many parents believe that spanking children is condoned or even commanded in the Bible. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. A common excuse for spanking a child is found in 5 verses in the book of Proverbs. However, the teaching of "biblical spanking" is a man-made teaching. 

One commonly cited rod verse is Proverbs 13:24 KJV:

He that spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

The Hebrew root word translated "son" is ben and refers to a mature adult son. The Hebrew root word translated "rod" is shebet and refers here to the rod of correction, namely a switch. Ultimately, this passage refers to the 40 minus 1 lashes, administered to the bare back, in a courtroom setting, as a sentence for a crime. The 40 minus 1 lashes was a final warning before an errant son was put to death. In the biblical context, it was unlawful to strike a fellow adult Jew outside of the context of a courtroom. It was unlawful to strike a minor child in all settings. The reason for this commandment is that, otherwise, fathers of adult sons would shield their children from blame, and would refuse to whip their sons.

Christ died and Rose on the Third Day in order to put an end to the harsh punishments of the Old Testament. Christ did this by enduring corporal punishment unjustly before being placed on the cross. The Early Christians did not use capital or corporal punishment as a form of church discipline. The Old Testament punishments were seen as God's flawed punishment, with Hell being the perfect punishment for sin. Christ opened up the gates of Heaven and Hell for motivation as to how to behave as a Christian, replacing the flawed Old Testament punishments.

The teaching of "biblical spanking" is a man-made teaching. The Bible nowhere legitimately calls for the corporal punishment of children, or any punishment of children for that matter. However, the Bible does touch on the spanking issue, and then some. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and here refers to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. it is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone else's feelings, you need to apologize. It works the same way when dealing with children. Thus in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize to your child for hurting their feelings. One thing that surely hurts a child's feelings is parent anger directed towards children. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to apologize for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper" and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards children alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was intended as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men. 

Contrary to popular belief, the parents in the biblical context did not enslave their children. Instead, attachment parenting was the norm in both the Old and the New Testament. All of the biblical writers also wrote parenting manuals that advocated attachment parenting. For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers, with children following mothers around wherever she went. For the latter years of childhood, children played freely outside, with thus play often being wet and messy in nature. Whenever children got into mischief, parents laughed with their child. When children lashed out at parents , parents cried with their children. The Early Christian context is an attachment parenting context, and is the perfect context for attachment parenting inspiration. 

The Early Christians, contrary to popular belief, were not well-integrated into Rome. Instead, the Early Christians shunned the broader Greco-Roman world, and the world at large. The Early Christians even had their own court system that was binding into the end of the 1st Century. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

 

Hebrews 12::5-6: Why this passage is not a pro-spanking passage

Many parents use the Bible as an excuse for spanking or punishing children. This is a common way for parents to excuse punishing their children. Most American parents cite 5 passages in Proverbs. as well as 1 passage in Proverbs as their "proof" that spanking is biblical. However, the core arguments in Hebrews about "biblical spanking" sits on shaky ground. The fact of the matter is that the passage in Heb. 12:5-6 is about enduring hardship, not spanking a child.

God's Word on trials and tribulations is spelled out in Hebrews 12:5-6 KJV:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation that speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 

This passage, when understood correctly, is comforting to me. The Greek root word translated "acourgeth" is μαστιγόω (Latin: mastigoó) and can have a figurative meaning to it, as is the case here. The rod here is a metaphor is a metaphor for enduring hardship known as rod language. When a Christian man had a long day at work, he instead said "God whipped me hard today". God clearly does not come down from the Heavens and whip His children. However, God does punish His children, like only He can, sending trials and tribulations the way of the believer. However, God only punishes His children when it does not harm them, whereas earthly parents only punish their children when it does, in fact, harm them. The Apostle Paul here was reassuring the Hebrew Christians in their persecution from Rome.

The teaching of "biblical spanking" is a man-made teaching. God does not want earthly parents to use His Parenting methods, lest they get it wrong. However, the Bible does weigh in on the spanking issue, and then some. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to simply stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone's feelings, you need to apologize. It works the same way when dealing with children. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize for hurting your child's feelings. One thing that hurts children's feelings the most is parent anger directed towards children. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper", and rhen commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of /Greek Christian parents in the Early Church who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Colossae as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The staple punishment in broader Greco-Roman society was an open-handed spanking to a bare bottom. Most Christians of the time shunned such treatment of children as a pagan custom that was of this world. However, pro-spanking infiltrators commonly brought their pagan ways with them into the church. The Apostle Paul would have none of it, and convicted the parishes at Colossae and Ephesus for their issues with pro-spanking infiltrators. 

It is a myth that the Early Christians were well-integrated into broader Greco-Roman society. Instead, the Early Christians lived in urban enclaves in major Greco-Roman cities, shunning the outside Greco-Roman world, and the world at large. The Early Christians even had their own court system, which was binding into the end of the 1st Century. 

It is also a myth that the Early Christians enslaved their children. The Early Christians practiced attachment parenting. For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers, following mom wherever she went. For the latter years of childhood, children played freely, often in a wet and messy way. Whenever children got into mischief, parents got a good laugh   When children lashed out at parents, parents cried with their children. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Child abuse definitions: Why the Bible calls for tougher laws on the books protecting children from abuse

Many parents think that the Bible has no concept of child abuse apart from obeying the law of the land. Most American parents support the present-day child abuse definitions under state and federal law. However, God's Law is above the law of the land. The Bible has its own definition of child abuse - whatever the child victim perceives as abuse.

The Greek root word denoting parental entitlement in the New Testament is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, wanting things from children, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, parental entitlement consists of a parent being sorely disappointed when they don't get the well-behaved child that they feel that they deserve. Parents are deserving of absolutely nothing in relation to children just for being parents. Even any parent anger directed towards children is parental entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. Whenever this sense of entitlement in parents then was perceived by a child as offensive or damaging, it was deemed child abuse. See also Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. Child abuse in the Bible, as a legal concept, consists of entitlement in parents, leading to offense in children. The key to not abusing your child is to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone else's feelings, you need to apologize. It works the same way with children when dealing with them. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize to your child for hurting their feelings. One thing that hurts children's feelings the most is parent anger directed towards children. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while settting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Colossae as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by a child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The Greek root word translated "they be discouraged" is αθυμέω (Latin: athumeo) and refers here to long-term damages, namely childhood trauma. The ancients in the Bible had a basic concept of childhood trauma. If a child grew up to be atheist, shame fell on the parents, meaning not the child. An atheist in the Early Church was seen as an abused child, not a "lost soul" to be "won over" 

The ancients in the Bible even had a concept of child sexual abuse. The Greek root word translated "fornication" in the New Testament is πορνεία (Latin: porneia) and refers here to anything out of the sexual norm in the Early/Church. This included any sexual relations or advances outside of the context of a Christian marriage between one adult man and one adult woman, with this commandment needing to be equal in terms of chronological age. Intergenerational marriage was banned in the Early Church. A groom was only allowed a bride his age or up to 4 years older. Most child sexual abuse in the biblical context happened in the form of father-child incest, with daughters being the usual victims. Fathers with parent attractions spent away their sexual desires for their children by way of righteous masturbation, meaning masturbation without pornography. Even all pornography was banned in the Early Church, meaning anything intended as such. Child sexual abuse was rare in the biblical context, meaning it was next to non-existent. Attraction to children was out in the open in the Early Church. Most men then had an attraction to their daughters, and masturbated to sexual thoughts of their daughters, being a man of few words when asked of his fantasies, including by his daughter. Whenever a man tried to hide his parent attractions when asked of such attractions, he was seen as suspect of child sexual abuse. Children then who were being sexually abused knew what was happening, and self-reported their own abuse that they suffered. Whenever child sexual abuse was found out, it was a huge moral outrage, with the given community being outraged by the abuse that the child suffered. 

Contrary to popular belief, the Early Christians were not well-integrated into Rome. Instead. the Early Christians lived in enclaves in major Greco-Roman cities, shunning the broader Greco-Roman world, and the world at large. The Early Christians even had their own court system, with these courts being binding into the end of the 1st Century. 

Child abuse was prosecuted in the Early Church by way of internal church investigation. This investigation usually started with a child confiding into a church clergyperson about their home life. From there, the parents were summoned to appear before a council of 3 church elders, who would preside over the investigation. If the parents at all got defensive in court, they were swiftly excommunicated from the Early Christian Churches of God, as well as any witnesses called to testify on the behalf of the parents.

The Bible is an anti-spanking document. All 88 books of the Bible - from Genesis to Revelation - were written by anti-spanking Jews, with spanking a child - then and now - being prohibited under Jewish law. All of the biblical writers also wrote parenting manuals that advocated attachment parenting. Even King Solomon wrote an attachment parenting manual, with the rod in Proverbs referring to the 40 minus 1 lashes, as a sentence for a crime. It just so happens that these attachment parenting manuals only being translated into English in the 1960s. Before then, this level of parenting knowledge was known only to the Jewish world. 

The Bible is America's book. America is a Christian nation, founded on Judeo-Christian values. We as a society glean from the Bible and its context as to how to live and treat each other with respect. Even our legal codes are based off of biblical teaching. However, the criminal defense of "reasonable chastisement" is based off of dated biblical teaching. It is about time that we repeal the "reasonable chastisement" defense, and redefine child abuse under state and federal law as whatever the child victim perceives as abuse. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Childhood bipolar disorder: How to discipline your bipolar child without punitive measures

In many cases, children develop childhood bipolar disorder. Most parents think that children who act up due to a mental health disorder need "a firm hand". With that said, child psychiatrists believe that the disorder cannot be disciplined without the child first being stabilized with medication. However, the fact of the matter is that there is a way to discipline your child with bipolar disorder. The idea is to catch them being good and praise them.

God's Law on disciplining children with bipolar disorder is spelled out in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

This first stanza of this commandment clarifies for the second that discipline should not hurt your bipolar child. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone else's feelings, you need to apologize. It is no different when dealing with children. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize to your child for hurting their feelings. One thing that perhaps hurts children's feelings the most is parent anger directed towards children. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology to your child for hurting their feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This stanza of this commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments. with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, and is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this stanza ultimately was received by the parish at Ephesus as prohibiting causing offenses children as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

This second stanza of this commandment refers to how to discipline your bipolar child without punishment or shaming. They aren't "bad kids", They simply have a mental health disorder. The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to a certain specific form of nurturing, namely of the teaching sort. Christian parents in the Early Church looked for preferred behaviors in children, such as self-discipline and self-control, and when children showed these traits, they were lavishly praised and encouraged for more of the same. Children with bipolar disorder always have moments of clarity when otherwise being deep in their mental illness. When a child with bipolar disorder has a moment of clarity, and manages to keep it together, they should be praised for their self-control. This should encourage more self-control in children. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and is more aptly translated as "instruction" in more modern versions of the Bible, with Paul here referring to religious instruction. Children with bipolar disorder usually cannot find religion until they are stabilized.

Most bipolar children lash out at parents at some point in their childhood. The idea behind this setup is the righteous acronym of righteous parent abuse. That means that even when your child is lashing out at you physically or verbally, you have to put up with their abuse, as they are your child. These outbursts are known as rage attacks, and usually come from the child hearing the word "no" from a parent. One way to deter attacks from your child is to cry out loud when they are attacking you.

It is futile to pick fights with a child with bipolar disorder. They actually might win. The more you try to control a bipolar child, the more they try to control you back, and a bipolar child just might win at that fight. The idea is to give up the fight with your bipolar child, and give in to their demands.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

 

Abortion: Why abortion is bad for women

Many on the political left support abortion rights. This is a common view amongst leftists. Most leftists support the so-called "right" for a woman to get an abortion. However, abortion is something that is bad for women, and benefits men.

The Bible mentions murder in Revelation 21:8 KJV:

But the fearful, and the unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. 

The Greek root word translated "murderers" is φονευς (Latin: phoneus) and refers to anyone who causes death in a human being apart from natural death. The Bible is clear, in context, that only God can take a life. Any death apart from natural death is prohibited in the Bible. This was understood in the Early Church as prohibiting abortion in all cases, including for rape, incest, or life of the mother.

Abortion is not good for women at all. Most women don't understand what abortion entails, or else they wouldn't get one. Abortion is not simply the doctor reaching in and taking the child out of the womb. An abortion consists of an medically-induced miscarriage. In the Early Church, abortion happened in the form of abortifacient tea that the mother drank in order to induce a miscarriage. Only the cold, unfeeling mothers ever got abortions then. Abortifacient herbs did not grow in Ancient Israel, and when they were brought in, the smugglers of such herbs were stopped at the border. No abortion ever took place in the Old Testament, or else it would have been seen as murder.

An unborn child is a child in their own right. The unborn child is not a part of the woman's body, but instead is a body within the mother's body. The unborn child has the DNA of both the father and the mother, in a way that makes the unborn child genetically unique. Unborn children are also genetically unique from their siblings. 

Even in the case of rape or incest, mothers can simply see the baby as theirs and not her abuser's baby. Abortion simply serves to cover up the evidence of sexual immorality, including rape and/or incest. Even in the case of life of the mother, the father is perfectly capable of caring for the baby once they are born. Most men are capable of lactating once they form a close enough bond with the child.

One compelling argument for abortion rights is the case of the pregnancy abusers. A pregnancy abuser keeps his partner pregnant in order to facilitate domestic violence. However, instead of blaming the baby, the police can simply arrest the man of the house for rape. Abortion simply serves to cover up the evidence for that form of domestic violence. 

Men benefit from abortion. Most abortions happen when a man gets his partner pregnant, and he doesn't want to take care of a baby. Ask any unmarried pro-life woman what happens when she says that she is pro-life - they all run away. That is because men can simply avoid fatherhood by pressuring their partner into an abortion. 

The early feminists warned women about the dangers of abortion. Abortion was popularized by eugenicist Margaret Sanger. Before then, most feminists were pro-life. I myself strive as a man to be a Christian feminist, and see myself in this article as warning women of the dangers of abortion.

I also support a safety net for the children already born, such as paid parental leave. I also support things such as daycare and college vouchers, as well as universal healthcare. The more expenses are taken care of by the government, the more money that families have to save. In 1 Corinthians 16:2, a church tax was collected on the first day of the week. If you needed money for free, you got free money. 

The depraved and entitled women who murder their children in the womb, and all who aid and abet, will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them descend into the abyss which is the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Repent!

The Fifth Commandment: Understanding the commandment to honor parents in context

Many parents feel entitled to being "honored". This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents insist on honor and respect from their children, citing the Fifth Commandment as their "proof'" that children need to honor and respect them. However, the fact of the matter is that the commanmdment to honor parents speaks of a specific form of honoring parents - caring for them as they age.

The Fifth Commandment is spelled out in Exodus 20:12 KJV:

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

And is repeated in Ephesians 6:2-3 KJV:

Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. 

The Greek root word translated "honour" in Eph. 6:2-3 is τιμαω (Latin: timao) and refers here to being a caregiver to someone else, namely an aging parent. The idea is to give your parents the same tender loving care that they gave you when you were still a child. However, this only works if you had good parents to begin with. If your parents were abusive in any way, you have the right to shun them. The reason for this specific commandment was that elder abuse and neglect was endemic in the Old Testament and in the parish at Ephesus.

A common reason for punishment of children is when parents feel "disrespected" or "dishonored". In some homes, punishment only comes when children are clearly "dishonoring" or "disrespecting" parents. However, any punitive treatment of children is prohibited in the Bible, including when children speak against parents. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child, including for "dishonoring" or "disrespecting" you. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone else's feelings, you need to apologize. It works the same way when dealing with children. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize whenever you hurt your child's feelings. One thing that hurts children's feelings more than anything is parent anger directed towards a child. If you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, and is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment ultimately was received by the parish at Ephesus as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men. 

Respect is not demanded in life. It is earned. The same is true in parenting. The idea in getting a respectful child is to show them respect, especially during the first 6 years of childhood. A parent is deserving of absolutely nothing in relation to their children. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Not even respect. Not even honor. These good things from children are earned.

Most children live under tyrannical rule, with children oftentimes being punished or treated punitively for not "honoring" their parents. Most parents feel entitled to respect and honor from their children, and enforce their deservances with punishment and shaming. However, the Fifth Commandment was not written to minor children, but to adult children of aging parents. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!