Hebrews 12::5-6: Why this passage is not a pro-spanking passage

Many parents use the Bible as an excuse for spanking or punishing children. This is a common way for parents to excuse punishing their children. Most American parents cite 5 passages in Proverbs. as well as 1 passage in Proverbs as their "proof" that spanking is biblical. However, the core arguments in Hebrews about "biblical spanking" sits on shaky ground. The fact of the matter is that the passage in Heb. 12:5-6 is about enduring hardship, not spanking a child.

God's Word in Hebrews 12:5-6 KJV:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation that speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 

This passage, when understood correctly, is comforting to me. The Greek root word translated "acourgeth" is μαστιγόω (Latin: mastigoó) and can have a figurative meaning to it, as is the case here. The rod here is a metaphor is a metaphor for enduring hardship known as rod language. When a Christian man had a long day at work, he instead said "God whipped me hard today". God clearly does not come down from the Heavens and whip His children. However, God does punish His children, like only He can, sending trials and tribulations the way of the believer. However, God only punishes His children when it does not harm them, whereas earthly parents only punish their children when it does, in fact, harm them. The Apostle Paul here was reassuring the Hebrew Christians in their persecution from Rome.

The teaching of "biblical spanking" is a man-made teaching. God does not want earthly parents to use His Parenting methods, lest they get it wrong. However, the Bible does weigh in on the spanking issue, and then some. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to simply stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. If you hurt someone's feelings, you need to apologize. It works the same way when dealing with children. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to apologize for hurting your child's feelings. One thing that hurts children's feelings the most is parent anger directed towards children. If you ever lose your cool with tour child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such aa "I apologize for hurting your feelings with my temper"., and rhen commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of /Greek Christian parents in the Early Church who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Colossae as prohibiting causing offenses in children as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The staple punishment in broader Greco-Roman society was an open-handed spanking to a bare bottom. Most Christians of the time shunned such treatment of children as a pagan custom that was of this world. However, pro-spanking infiltrators commonly brought their pagan ways with them into the church. The Apostle Paul would have none of it, and convicted the parishes at Colossae and Ephesus for their issues with pro-spanking infiltrators. 

It is a myth that the Early Christians were well-integrated into broader Greco-Roman society. Instead, the Early Christians lived in urban enclaves in major Greco-Roman cities, shunning the outside Greco-Roman world, and the world at large. The Early Christians even had their own court system, which was binding into the end of the 1st Century. 

It is also a myth that the Early Christians enslaved their children. The Early Christians practiced attachment parenting. For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers, following mom wherever she went. For the latter years of childhood, children played freely, often in a wet and messy way. Whenever children got into mischief, parents got a good laugh   When children lashed out at parents, parents cried with their children. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!