Honor thy parents: Understanding the Fifth Commandment in context

Many parents insist on it. Most American parents insist on respect from their children. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents punish their children when they feel "dishonored". However, honoring parents means honoring them in a certain specific way - caring for them as they age.

The Fifth Commandment is spelled out in Exodus 20:12 KJV:

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

And is repeated in Ephesians 6:2-3 KJV:

Honour your father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

The Greek root word translated "honour" in Eph. 6:2 is τιμαο (Latin: timao) and refers here to a specific form of honoring parents, with that being caring for them as they age. The idea is to give back to your parents in some way, as thanksgiving for how your parents were nothing but kind and charitable towards you. However, this only works if your parents never abused you. If you were abused by your parents, you have the right to shun your parents, You only have to forgive your parents for abusing you if they give a meaningful apology for them offending you. Even then, if your parents go back on their apology, you can go back on your forgiveness.

"Dishonoring" parents is a common reason for parents punishing children. Most American parents punish their children when they feel "dishonored". In many homes, parents punish their children merely for children "dishonoring" them, meaning when they speak against parents. However, the Bible prohibits any and all punitive parenting, including when parents feel "dishonored". See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child, including for "dishonoring" parents. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing them altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. Avoiding offense in children is the same as avoiding offense in other adults. Just as hurt feelings are inevitable in relations between adults, hurt feelings are also inevitable in children when dealing with them. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt their feelings. Usually, all that is necessary is a reassurance of good intent coming from parents, in the form of an informal apology, whenever you hurt their feelings with limits not set out of anger, such as "I'm sorry, but I had to set X limit for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my temper with you" and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin term roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received as prohibiting all offenses as perceived by a child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and oppsoed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The only reason for the Fifth Commandment was an elder abuse and neglect in both the Old Testament and the parish at Ephesus. Thus, God gave the commandment, through the inspired pen of Moses and Paul respectively, for parents to be cared for as a reward for being a good parent. 

However, if your parents were ever abusive towards you, you owe nothing to those parents. The only reason that you would have to forgive your parents is if they give a credible apology. Even  then, if parents went back on their apology, you could go back on your forgiveness. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which  is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

 

 

Passing down the faith: How to instruct your children in the Lord without punitive measures

Many parents want their children to have values. This is a common goal for parents. Most American parents want their children to have some values. However, punitive treatment of children is not the way to teach a values system to a child. Children don't need religion to be beaten into them. Religion is a base human need for children and adults alike.

God's Law on child discipline, including religious instruction, is spelled out in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring then up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

This first stanza clarifies for the second that religious instruction should not hurt. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child, including in order to "beat the devil out of them". However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing them altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. Avoiding offense in children is the same as avoiding offense in other adults. Just like hurt feelings are inevitable in relations between adults, hurt feelings are also inevitable in children when dealing with them. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt your child's feelings. Usually, all that is necessary is a reassurance of good intent coming from parents, in the form of an informal apology, whenever you hurt your child with limits not set out of anger, such as "I'm sorry, but I had to set X limit for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my cool with you" and then commit never to lose your cool with your children ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This first stanza of this commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this first stanza of this commandment ultimately was received by the parish at Ephesus as prohibiting any offenses as perceived by a child, at minimum. Paul. contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

It is a myth that children need to have a religion beaten into them. Religion is a basic human need for children and adults alike. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and is more aptly translated as "instruction" in more modern versions of the Bible. The Apostle Paul here is discussing religious instruction. Starting at age 6, fathers left out a Bible for children to discover and explore, leaving the Bible open to a reassuring passage. When children were caught in the act of studying the Bible, parents then lavishly praised and encouraged to keep on studying. Then, fathers interjected something along the lines of "you can ask me anything about that book". From there, religious instruction came in the form of question and answer, with children being curious about Scripture, and with fathers giving pointers in the context. 

A common situation in Christian homes is church refusal. Many times, a young child - under age 6 usually - will refuse to go to church, However, in the Early Church, the man of the house went to church on behalf of his wife and children when the children were under age 6. Most children growing up in the Early Church were not introduced to Scripture until they turned 6. The first 6 years of childhood involved giving children nourishment and sustenance, with breastfeeding sometimes not ending until the child turned 6. The idea is not to force religion down the throat of children, but instead allow your child to find God on their own. Let them choose which church that they want to go to.

A common way for parents to impart a religious education on children is to "break their will", meaning keep punishing them, and punish them some more, until the child is forced to surrender to Christ. However, a child does not have a will to be broken. Children simply have wants, and in most cases, they aren't asking for much. 

Religious development in children is often hastened by parents. One way that the religious development of children is rushed by parents is through forcing grateful postures. The key with grateful postures is to look for them in your child. If your child shows grateful postures on their own, they are in a good spiritual place. I tie my hands behind my back in grateful form when out and about in public, and nobody made me.

You may not get your child to have the exact same beliefs as you. However, all that should matter is that your child have a set of values to live by. Most children will find their own values, in a way that helps them behave and not be defiant or disorderly. Religion is a human need for children, and they will find religion entirely on their own if you let them.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Expanding child abuse definitions: Why the Bible calls for tougher laws on the books protecting children from abuse

Many parents think that the Bible has no concept of child abuse apart from obeying the law of the land. Most American parents support the present-day child abuse definitions under state and federal law. However, God's Law is above the law of the land. The Bible has its own definition of child abuse - whatever the child victim perceives as abuse.

The Greek root word denoting parental entitlement is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, wanting things from children, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, parental entitlement consists of a parent who is sorely disappointed whenever they don't get the well-behaved child that they feel that they deserve. Parents are deserving of absolutely nothing in relation to children just for existing. Even any parent anger directed towards children is parental entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. Whenever this sense of entitlement in parents was perceived by children as offensive or damaging, it was deemed child abuse. See also Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. Child abuse in the Bible, as a legal concept, consists of entitlement in parents, leading to offense in children. The key to not abusing your child is to avoid offense in your child. Avoiding offense in children is the same as avoiding offense in other adults. Just like hurt feelings are inevitable in relations between adults, hurt feelings are also inevitable in children when dealing with them. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt their feelings. Usually, all that is necessary is a reassurance of good intent coming from parents, in the form of an informal apology, whenever you hurt their feelings with limits not set out of anger, such as "I'm sorry, but I had to set X limit for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology to your child for hurting their feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my temper with you", and then commit never to losing your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translated as "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive measures on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was received in the parish at Colossae as prohibiting any offenses stemming from entitlement as perceived by children. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The Greek root word translated "they be discouraged" is αθυμέω (Latin: athumeo) and refers here to long-term damages, namely childhood trauma. The ancients in the Bible had their own understanding of childhood trauma. Whenever a child grew up to be atheist, shame fell onto the parents, meaning never the atheist child. An atheist in the Early Church was seen as an abused child, not a "lost soul" to "win over". 

The ancients in the Bible even had a concept of child sexual abuse. The Greek root word translated "fornication" is πορνεία (Latin: porneia) and refers here to any sexual relations outside of a Christian marriage between one adult man and one adult woman, with the marriage being equal in terms of age. A groom was allowed a bride his chronological age or else up to 4 years older. Intergenerational marriages were banned under Christian law then  The most common form of child sexual abuse in the Early Church was father-child incest, with daughters being the usual targets. Fathers avoided sexually abusing his child by way of righteous masturbation, meaning masturbation to mental images of children as opposed to pornography of any kind. Pornography of all sorts was prohibited under Christian law then. Child sexual abuse, in the Early Church, happened rarely, meaning it was next to non-existent. Whenever it happened then, it was a huge moral outrage.

It is a myth that the Early Christians were well-integrated into broader Greco-Roman society. The Early Christians lived in enclaves in big cities across the Greco-Roman word, shunning the outside world. The Early Christians had their own customs and culture, apart from the broader Greco-Roman culture.

Child abuse was prosecuted in the Early Church by way of internal church investigation. The investigation usually started with a child confiding in a clergyperson about their home life. From there, the parents were summoned to appear before a council of 3 elders, who would decide the fate of the parents. If the parents at all defended themselves in court, as opposed to answering to the court directly, the parents were excommunicated from the Early Christian Churches of God. 

The Bible is an anti-spanking document. All 88 books of the Bible - from Genesis to Revelation - were written by anti-spanking Jews, with no Jew worth mentioning ever endorsing anything punitive with a child. All of the biblical writers also wrote parenting manuals, with these parenting manuals advocating attachment parenting. Even King Solomon wrote an attachment parenting manual, with the rod of correction in Proverbs referring to the 40 minus 1 lashes. It just so happens that these parenting manuals were not translated into English until the 1960s. However, these parenting manuals were known to the Jewish world much earlier.

The Bible is America's book. America is a Christian nation, founded on Judeo-Christian values. We as a society glean from the Bible and its context as to how to live and treat each other with respect. Even our legal codes under the English common law come from the Bible, However, the "reasonable chastisement" defense is based off of dated biblical understanding, We now know what childhood was like for children in the Early Church .It is about time we repeal the "reasonable chastisement" defense in all 50 states, as well as expanding the scope of child abuse definitions - under state and federal law - to prohibit anything that is perceived by the child victim as abuse. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Abortion: Why abortion is bad for women (and benefits male entitlement)

Many people on the political left support abortion as a so-called "right". Most modern feminists support abortion as a form of "women's empowerment". However, I myself am a feminist of the pro-life sort, and I oppose abortion in all cases, as well as any unnatural death  As a man, I am to look out for the welfare of women. Abortion is bad for women.

The Sixth Commandment is spelled out in Exodus 20:13 KJV:

Thou shalt not kill.

The Greek root word repeating the Sixth Commandment is φονος (Latin: phonos) and refers here to any death apart from natural death, including even accidental death. The ancients considered an unborn child to be a valid child from the point of conception. Whenever an abortion was committed in the Early Church, the man who got her pregnant was also charged with fornication for leading her down the wrong path. Any abortifacient herbs were considered an illicit substance under the Greek root word μεθυσος (Latin: methusos). No abortions happened in the Old Testament because of how abortifacients were classified in terms of them being illicit drugs. 

You can be feminist and be pro-life. The foremothers of the feminist movement actively warned women of the dangers of abortion. Abortion is bad for women. That is because the procedure consists of a medically-induced miscarriage, with the stillborn child coming out on his/her due date. This usually causes trauma in women. Most women only go to the abortion clinic once, and then vow never to go there again as their baby comes out stillborn. 

Science proves that an unborn child is a human life. The genetics of an unborn child are unique to the individual unborn child. The unborn child always has the genes of both the mother and the father, with this setup being the case since the moment of conception. 

Abortion ultimately benefits male entitlement, as it is an easy way for a man to escape responsibility as a man, including fatherly responsibility. Many times, the father of the unborn child pressures the mother to get an abortion, with this usually coming with the intent to cover up for an extramarital affair or liaison. Abortion is a good way to cover up for sexual immorality, including rape.

I am opposed to abortion even in the case of rape, incest, or life of the mother. In the case of rape and incest, abortion serves to cover up the evidence of sexual offenses perpetrated against women and children. In the case of life of the mother, the father should be able to care for the baby in most instances. Men can nurture, but most men feel insecure in that role. They need to man up and take responsibility for being a father. 

There is an east way to prevent abortions. If a man wants to not get a woman pregnant, he can simply keep it in his pants. Most abortion is perpetrated against an unborn child conceived out of wedlock. Thus, all sexual relations must take place within the context of marriage. This Christian standard is ultimately spelled out in the New Testament by the Greek root word πορνεία (Latin: porneia). See 1Cor. 7:1-5. 

Abortion can be used to cover up the evidence for moral crimes against women, If women were not allowed to get abortions, the pregnant bellies of women would provide clear evidence of sexually amoral behavior on the part of men, including rape and incest. One compelling argument from the left in terms of legal abortion is the existence of pregnancy abusers. A pregnancy abuser gets his wife pregnant, and keeps her pregnant, in order to keep her quartered in the house. However, that pregnancy is evidence of rape, and it comes from rape pretty much always. Lock up the defiled rapist who quarters his wife like that, and let the child have a chance at life. A better way to liberate women is to have stronger anti-rape statutes, including a ban on marital rape. No child should die in order to liberate a woman. 

It is a myth that women are having abortions done left and right. Abortion is a rare procedure. Therefore, a lot of women are listening to their maternal intuition when they refuse to get an abortion themselves. A procedure that unpopular can be easily done away with.\

Being pro-life does not necessitate being pro-birth. I support social welfare for all Americans, from the womb to the tomb. I support a safety net for those who need it, such as universal healthcare and daycare. When certain expenses are taken care of by the state, that leaves with more money in the pockets of ordinary American families. The Bible also allows for granting free money to the poor as part of a church tax (see 1Cor. 16:1-2). No Christian family went hungry in the Early Church, as Christian church parishes then were close-knit enclaves that shunned the outside world. I also oppose all unnatural death, including war and the death penalty. 

Rights of the unborn are children's rights. Abortion was a concept in the Early Church, and it was hated, even among women. A mother who drank abortifacient tea as an herbal "remedy" was seen as a cold and unfeeling mother. Even today, even most pro-choice women avoid abortion clinics due to it being against their maternal intuition. An unborn child is a valid child, in need of protection just like children do outside of the womb. 

Abortion is not the same as women's health. When a doctor reaches into the birth canal, that counts as a D&C, not an abortion, and that only happens once the baby has died naturally in the womb. Abortion is usually given as a prescription drug known as an abortifacient. The baby passes on his/her due date, but stillborn. 

I do not hate women as a pro-lifer. I am simply looking out for women, much like a responsible gentleman does as a courtesy to the opposite sex. I am a pro-life feminist. Abortion is bad for women, and benefits me as a man. I avoid sexual relations with women because I don't have a wife, and this alone makes sure that no woman gets an abortion because of me. Married sex is the safest sex out there, and the best place to have a child is in the context of a Christian marriage between one adult man and one adult woman. However, all children should be cherished, including those born out of wedlock or otherwise unplanned. If I were an entitled man, and slept around, I would benefit from legal abortion in that I wouldn't have to care for a child - I could just pressure the woman I am with to get an abortion. However, I find it easier to just not get women pregnant out of wedlock, and thus I am not allowed to have sex with any woman, as I do not have a wife. I don't want any woman to get an abortion, as abortion is bad for women, being that it is a medically-induced miscarriage. In Christian feminism, a man can look out for women in this regard, as long as he is a gentleman about it.

The depraved and entitled mothers who murder children in the womb, and all who aid and abet, will be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Repent!

Child discipline: How to discipline your child without punitive measures

Many parents want their children to have discipline. This is a common goal for parents to have. However, most American parents equate discipline with punishment. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. However, there are better ways to discipline your child than punitive measures.

God's Law on child discipline is spelled out in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 

This first stanza clarifies for the second that discipline should not hurt. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing them altogether for that reason. You need to avoid offense in children. Avoiding offense in children is the same as avoiding offense in other adults. Just as hurt feelings are inevitable in relations between adults, hurt feelings are inevitable in children when dealing with them. Thus, in order to avoid offense in children, you need to be willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt your child's feelings. Usually, all that is necessary is a reassurance of good intent coming from parents, in the form of an informal apology, whenever a child cannot accept limits set not out of anger, such as "I'm sorry, but I had to set X limit for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting their feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my temper with you". and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards children is entitlement,  and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received as prohibiting any offenses as perceived by a child. Paul. contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and oppoeed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The second stanza of this commandment spells out what discipline is acceptable, with the first stanza ruling out anything punitive with a child. The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to a certain specific form of nurturing, namely of the teaching type. Christian parents in the Early Church looked for preferred behaviors in children, usually in the form of self-discipline and self-control. Whenever children showed preferred behaviors, they were given praise and encouragement. Children were left to find discipline on their own, and when they did, their parents encouraged them to keep working on their self-improvement. Christian parents in the Early Church set a good example for their children to follow, but backed this example up with praise and encouragement, not punishment or shaming. Children also should have religious instruction, as religion is a human need for children and adults alike. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and is better translated as "instruction" in more modern versions of the Bible. The Apostle Paul here was referring to religious instruction. Starting at around age 6, fathers left out a copy of the Bible for children to discover and explore, with the copy of the Bible left open to a reassuring passage. When children were caught in the act of studying the Bible, they were given lavish praise and encouragement for more Bible study of the same. Then, fathers interjected something along the lines of "you can ask me anything about that book". From there, religious instruction came in question and answer format, with children being curious about Scripture, and with fathers giving pointers on the context. This second stanza points out the Hebraic tradition of positive reinforcement, meaning catching children being good. Positive reinforcement is an ancient Hebraic tradition predating the coming of Christ by thousands of years.

Every child is different. Some children are more spirited, and some are more easygoing. The idea is to start out setting no limits apart from when children are endangering themselves or others. A more easygoing child is the kind of child to surrender to their parents, and ask them to set limits for them, in which case you should set more limits for that particular child. A more spirited child needs time to form their own discipline, and then be praised when they do find discipline. 

Sometimes, a parent has to set limits for the safety of children and/or others. However, children accepting limits like that is another story. Whenever your child cannot accept a set limit, you need to apologize for hurting their feelings. Usually, all that is necessary is an informal apology when limits were not set out of anger, to prove non-entitlement. However, if you lose your cool with your child as a parent, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, as any parent anger directed towards children alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

"Benign" deprivation: Why saying "no" to children "frequent and often" can be seen as child abuse

Many parents buy into the concept of "benign" deprivation. Most American parents make it a point to say "no" to most everything that a child wants. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. However, most American parents need an attitude adjustment on this issue. Saying "no" to children "frequent and often" is considered child abuse when it offends the child, which is pretty much always.

God's Law on child abuse is spelled out in Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. The key here to not abusing your child is to avoid offense in children. Avoiding offense in children is the same as avoiding offense in other adults. Just like hurt feelings are inevitable in relations between adults, hurt feelings are also inevitable in children when dealing with them. One thing that hurts a child's feelings is to say "no" to them "frequent and often". The idea behind avoiding offense in children is to avoid saying "no" to a child, or setting limits with them altogether, except when absolutely necessary for the safety of children and/or others. When children cannot accept limits not set out of anger, you need to give an informal apology for hurting your child's feelings with such limits, such as "I'm sorry, but I have to set X limits for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my temper with you", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards a child is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christians who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias porestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Ephesus as prohibiting all forms of offenses stemming from entitlement as perceived by the child, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway,  obeying God over men.

The Early Christians were hated largely for being too "soft" on their children. The Early Christians dd set limits with children, but only for safety concerns. A modern example of this is when children play ball inside, in which case the parent asks politely and gratefully for the game of ball to go outside. Children could be physically restrained in the Early Church, but only in the lightest of forms, and only for things such as running into oncoming traffic. Apart from that, children were left free reign. When children made messes, parents got a good laugh before picking up the mess. 

A common place of contention in conventional parenting today is the store. Most parents think that giving children what they want in the store leads to them wanting "more  more, and then some". However, the child is usually asking for something inexpensive such as a candy bar. Let them have it. In the Early Church, children usually wanted licorice from the candy stand, in which case the parent asked for the item, and then she paid for it before handing it back to the child to enjoy. You may find that children aren't asking for much. All they care about is that it comes from YOU.

The idea when offering things to your child is to avoid choice overload. For example, when at the restaurant, give them a list of items on the menu, and see what they choose. If they choose something entirely different, then go with that and scrap all of the other choices you gave them. Try to keep the list of items short, preferably limiting the number of options to 2. 

Christian parents in the Early Church did not order children around. Instead, they politely asked things of their children from the bottom of their heart, with the child usually trusting in parents enough for immediate compliance. The key to gaining the trust of children is to avoid punishing them, and also avoid offending them in any way, shape, or form. If you have punished or offended them before, you need to repent in front of your child, promising never to offend them ever again. See Matt. 22:35-40; 25:31-46.  

Children only need limits when they are acting in a dangerous manner. Children will form their own moral beliefs as they get older, with religion being a human need for children and adults alike. Most children will find God on their own, and will need minimal guidance when they ask questions about the context of what they are reading in the Bible. I myself do not want a child to be in lockstep with my values, necessarily. I want them to simply have a set of values, with them choosing the set of values that they want to live by. If a child chooses to have no values at all, that brings shame onto the parents of the child for child abuse, or else anyone else who spiritually abused the child enough for them to reject all religion. Usually, religious development starts at age 6 naturally, which is when Christian parents should leave out a Bible, and leave it open at the most reassuring verse you can find, such as the Beatitudes. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

"Biblical spanking": Why the rod verses in Proverbs are repealed verses

Many parents use the Bible as an excuse for spanking their child. In the book of Proverbs, there exist 5 passages known as rod verses. These verses are often used as an argument for spanking a child. However, these verses are ultimately repealed verses. Nowhere does the Bible say to spank a child. 

There are 6 verses that mention the rod in the book of Proverbs, with the most widely quoted verse being Proverbs 13:24 KJV:

He who spareth his rod hateth his son: but he who loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

The Hebrew root word translated "son" is ben and refers to a mature adult son. The Hebrew root word translated "rod" is shebet and refers to, in the context of Proverbs, the rod of correction, namely a switch. The rod verses in Proverbs ultimately refer to a form of judicial corporal punishment known as the 40 minus 1 lashes, administered to a father or next-of-kin, to the bare back, in the context of a courtroom, as a sentence for a crime. Under Jewish law in the Old Testament, striking  another Jew was prohibited outside the context of a courtroom, with striking a minor child being prohibited in all settings. The 40 minus 1 lashes were a final warning before an errant son was put to death, and could only exist in that given context. The reason for this commandment is that, otherwise, the father would just refuse to whip his son, as Jewish parents then were slow to blame their adult children for anything.

Christ died on the cross in order to repeal the harsh punishments of the Old Testament. Christ experienced both capital and corporal punishment unjustly, and so the Early Christians banned such punishments, and shunned all whippings and executions under Roman law. It is a myth that the Early Christians were well-integrated into Greco-Roman society, with the Early Christians living in enclaves in big cities, shunning the outside Greco-Roman world. Corporal punishment seeped its way into the Christian Church by way of European pagan influence on the Western Christian Church, with the European pagans being brutes with their children.

The teaching of "biblical spanking" is a man-made teaching. Nowhere in the New Testament are the rod verses repeated, with Heb. 12:5-6 referring to trials and tribulations being sent by God the way of His elect. However, the Bible does weigh in on the spanking issue, and then some. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your child. However, it is not enough to stop spanking your child, or even stop punishing your child altogether for that matter. You need to avoid offense in children. A child has the right to take offense when their parents are acting entitled, including towards them. Children usually take it personally by crying tears of displeasure. Whenever your child takes it personally, you need to be willing to give an apology as soon as possible. Usually, all that is necessary is an informal apology whenever you hurt your child's feelings with limits not set out if anger, such as "I'm sorry, but I had to set X limit for Y reasons". However, if you ever lose your cool with your child as a parent, including while setting limits, you definitely need to give a formal apology for hurting your child's feelings with your anger, such as "I apologize for losing my temper with you", and then commit never to lose your cool with your child ever again, as any parent anger directed towards children alone is entitlement, and was seen aa entitlement in the Early Church. Whenever your child takes it personally, with their feelings being hurt, you should apologize appropriately, lest it be officially an offense. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, such as spanking or other forms of punishment of children. However, this commandment was ultimately received by the parish at Colossae as prohibiting any offense in children stemming from entitlement in parents, at minimum. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

Parent anger directed towards children was completely prohibited in the Early Church.  Most parents in the Early Church were motivated by anxiety, being expressed usually as worry or concern. The only time parents were allowed to get angry was to protect their child from interlopers. Anger at a child then was seen as akin to a viper - maybe the child was given some warning, but that was about it.

Children in the Early Church were not seen as bad or sinful, even when they acted up. Whenever children got into mischief, the parents had a good laugh before cleaning up their messes. Children in the Early Church were instead seen as among the poor and the vulnerable, with God identifying with the vulnerability of children. See Matt. 25:31-46. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!