Righteous pampering: Why God wants you to pamper and baby your child

Many parents feel the need to be punitive with their children. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents want to avoid being seen as pampering their child. However, the fact of the matter is that parents are obligated to pamper and baby their children, especially during the first 6 years of childhood. 

Righteous pampering is a part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossian 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This highlighted word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to perform good works for their child, with the child resting securely in the good works of parents.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards a child. In the Old Testament. punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their child were charged with kidnapping - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking. and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Righteous pampering does not refer to any old pampering, but instead pampering and babying children in a certain specific way, using the context as a guidepost. For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness with mothers, meaning that wherever the mother went, so did her child. For the first 2 years of childhood, children were constantly held by mothers, either in her loving arms, or else on mom's back in a papoose bag when her hands were full. Between ages 2-6, children ranged next to mothers, following mom from room to room, not allowing mom out of their line of sight, morbidly fearing that mom would "go away and never come back". Whenever children cried, mothers cooed at their children before picking them up, and from there, she diagnosed the need before meeting the child's need. Maybe the child was tired. Maybe the child was hungry. Maybe the child needed mom's milk. Maybe the child needed mom, period  Whatever children needed, they got it. Whenever mothers and children under age 6 were out and about in public, mom wrapped up her young child next to her bosom in swaddling blankets, with the swaddling blankets - and the child with them - tucked underneath the loose-fitting, revealing dress worn by mothers that resembled an apron. Come nightfall, children co-slept next to their parents. with this co-sleeping sustaining warmth happening every night, until the onset of puberty, which was when most children wanted their own place to sleep. Children went naked wherever they went, with mothers also going naked within the confines of the family home. This birth nudity setup helped facilitate easy skin-on-skin warmth, with children experiencing skin-on-skin contact merely when picked up.

After children attained the age of 6, children were allowed to play freely outside, naked. Older children who played outside engaged in wet and messy play. Children past age 6 explored the terrain, venturing farther and farther from home, playing in the mud. However, children had to check in with mom first, to tell her where they were going. Come evening, children were called by name - one by one - and were treated to a nice warm meal, after being cleaned up by mom with a handrag.

Children under age 6 were very much protected, in a sheltered way. This was because the child could not appreciate the environmental hazards found outside, namely venomous snakes and scorpions, with there being no antivenom then. However, even today, children under age 6 had dangers to face while being outside, namely oncoming traffic and would-be kidnappers. Children under age 6 usually want mom and mom only during the first 6 years of childhood, and so it all worked out.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent. for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!