Separation anxiety: Why children cry seemingly out of nowhere

Many parents have to deal with it. A child crying for seemingly no reason at all. This is a common situation that parents find themselves in. Most parents punish their children as a means of dealing with children crying seemingly out of nowhere. However, the fact of the matter is that children usually need YOU and YOU only as a reassurance for separation anxiety.

Tending to the cries of separation anxiety is part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This highlighted word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents perform good works for their child, with children resting in the good works of parents, with good works being defined as doing good things for your child, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Most parents experience their children crying out of nowhere. This is a common reason for parents punishing their children. However, all crying in children has a reason for it. The most common reason for crying is separation anxiety. 

Children growing up in the Early Church cried whenever they wanted mom to stay within their line of sight. Children then who were under age 6 morbidly feared mothers "going away and never coming back". Children cried a screeching, deathly cry when they wanted attachment with mom. Whenever children cried, mothers cooed at children before picking them up, and from there, she diagnosed the need before meeting that need.

Children growing up in the Early Church, when under age 6, needed constant reassurance that mom wasn't going anywhere. Children cried loud and deathly cries whenever they needed bonding time with mom. This is when mothers cooed at the children, with cooing being a primal vocalization that put children at ease.

Children in biblical times, unlike children today, were able to experience the full range of emotions, including cries due to separation anxiety. Children today are not allowed to experience their full range of emotions. Thus, children suppress their separation anxiety, with the crying fits being the tip of the emotional iceberg that is a child today.

Children under age 6 need constant reassurance that mom isn't going anywhere. It is recommended that mothers stay home for the first 6 years of childhood. This is what was done in the Early Church, and this was because children otherwise were faced with their worst fear - mom seemingly "going away and never coming back". Maybe a woman is capable of work like a man is, but at what cost to the child? It should be safe for mothers to return to work once the children attain the age of 6, and cease the cries for attachment.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!