Honor parents: Understanding the Fifth Commandment in context

Many parents think that they are entitled to being honored by their children. This is a common wish on the part of parents. However, the Fifth Commandment simply refers to caring for aging parents, and only if they earned such care. 

God's Law states in Exodus 20:12 KJV:

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

This commandment simply means that aging parents were cared for in Ancient Israelite society. However, parents had to earn being cared for, and that meant parents had to care for their children when they were still young. If parents were abusive at all, children could shun their parents.

Honoring parents is a part of the doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This highlighted word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment ultimately came from  parent submission, where parents are to selflessly serve their children as they would God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Proper parenting, as understood in its original context, reaped rewards for parents later on. Most parents in the Early Church were attachment parents, and loved their children deeply. The rewards came later, in the form of children caring for aging parents, or else with children giving back to their parents in some way. I myself honor my mother by paying the restaurant bill. Maybe my mother did abuse me, but I forgive while still remembering what she did to me. If she wasn't sorry, I could disown her just for that.

The depraved and entitled patents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Separation anxiety: Why children sometimes cry for seemingly no reason at all

Many parents think that children cry out of nowhere. This is normal behavior on the part of children. The fact of the matter is that children under age 6 cry out of nowhere due to separation anxiety. Separation anxiety is a normal stage of child development. 

Tending to children in the throes of separation anxiety is part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: as this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This Greek root word ultimately refers to secure attachment between parents and children in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to serve children selflessly just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking or punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Children sometimes cry for seemingly no reason at all. However, the every cry of a child had a need behind it. Most of the time, children needed mom the most. A common reason for children to cry out loud is separation anxiety. This separation anxiety involved children being morbidly afraid of mom "going away and never coming back".

Children growing up in the Early Church were allowed to feel separation anxiety. Children then let out a deathly, screeching cry when mom was out of sight, and otherwise were seemingly attached to mom's hip. However, most children are never able to experience these emotions due to being punished for even crying "out of turn"'.

Children growing up in the Early Church, like today, needed reassurance that mom wasn't going anywhere. Children under age 6 struggled with object permanence, meaning that they didn't internalize mom's mental image yet. Thus, children younger than age 6 needed mom's constant presence, with mom instead staying put and not leaving her child's side. 

It is recommended that mothers stay home with their children for the first 6 years of childhood. Leaving children at a daycare facility runs the risk of children developing an attachment injury, meaning they cry out for you past age 6, with their crying keeping day care workers on their feet. In the Early Church, fathers brought home the bread, with mothers tending to children. That was because children needed mom's presence in order to feel safe and secure.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices. Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Righteous ordering: Why parents are to heel to the command of children

Many parents think that they call the shots. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents demand that children listen to them. However, the Bible, when understood in context, endorses parents heeling to the command of children. 

The doctrine of righteous ordering is part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission to children. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to their children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Righteous ordering means that children have the right to order their parents around from their place of rest, with parents heeling to the command of their children. By default, Christian parents in the Early Church were prohibited under customary law from telling their children "no". The only exceptions to this general rule is if the orders from children were unsafe, unworkable, and/or immoral. Even then, when children were told "no", it came with reassurance and an explanation. Even in that case, parents usually used nicer words than an abrupt "no" such as "that won't work" or "that can't happen".

Righteous ordering can be understood as akin to ordering at a restaurant. You can have it your way, but it has to be on the menu. If an item is unavailable, the waitress is nice about it, even if you aren't. Bringing up children is much like being a waitress at a restaurant. A waitress serves others selflessly, just as a parent serves their children selflessly.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Crying: Why children crying is not bad behavior

Many parents have had to deal with it. A child is crying. Most parents assume that the child is trying to "undermine" them. However, the fact of the matter is that children cry out loud when they needed something from mom or dad. 

Tending to a crying child is a part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parent. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parents and children in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon

Children cried in biblical times, much as they do today. However, mothers then did not interpret crying as a means to "undermine" their "authority". Instead, mothers interpreted the child's every cry as expressing a vulnerable need. Whenever children cried, mothers cooed before picking up the child, and from there, she diagnosed the need before meeting that need. 

One main reason that children cry is separation anxiety, For the first 6 years of childhood, children cried a screeching, deathly cry when mother was out of the child's line of sight. Children cried in biblical times when they feared that mom would "go away and never come back". Mothers attended to such cries by reassuring children of her presence. 

Another reason for crying in children is the frequent use of the word "no". Under customary law then, the general rule was that parents were prohibited from using the word "no" on their child. The only exception to this general rule was if the child was asking for something unsafe, unworkable, and/or immoral. Even then, parents used nicer sounding words than "no", such as "that won't work" or "that can't happen". From there, children were offered an explanation and a reason for the declining of requests. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

How to pacify a crying child in public

Many parents think that children need punishment in order to be pacified. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. However, children growing up in the Early Church were commonly pacified by way of being held next to the mother's bosom in swaddling blankets.

Swaddling blankets were part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting. including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of children in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon. 

Children under age 6, when out and about, were wrapped up next to the bosom of mothers, in swaddling blankets. Mothers first tied the swaddling blankets from the left breast, then across the dot to the right leg, or vice versa, or both in the case of twins. From there, the swaddling blankets - and the child with them - were tucked underneath the loose-fitting, revealing dress worn by mothers that resembled an apron. Whenever children cried in public, they were held even closer to mom's bosom, in skin-on-skin bliss! The swaddling blankets used by mothers were made of velvet, with velvet being grown throughout the Ancient Middle East.

Breastfeeding is important in pacifying crying children in public. Whenever children cried, mom started diagnosing the need by offering the child her teat. When the child continued to cry, the mother searched for the need, and then met that need. Breastfeeding was allowed in the Early Church at any time the mother was called to breastfeed, including in public. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parents will nor inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Time-in: Why mammary closeness is the biblical way of doing time-in

Many parents think that children need time-out, or else an occasional disciplinary spanking done "out of love". This is a common practice amongst American parents. However, the fact of the matter is that the proper way of dealing with a crying child is time-in. There are many ways to do time-in, but the biblical way of doing time-in is mammary closeness.

Mammary closeness was seen in biblical times as part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to their children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Time-in can come in many forms. Some parents actually send their child to a "calming corner". However, when using the context as a guidepost, the only way to do time-in is mammary closeness. When children cried, mothers cooed at children before picking them up in mammary closeness, and from there,  the mother diagnosed the need of the child, then meeting that need. Maybe the child was tired. Maybe the child was hungry. Maybe the child needed mom's milk. Maybe the child needed mom, period. Whatever the child needed, they got it.

Mammary closeness and breastfeeding go hand in hand. In most cases, mothers breastfed children until the child refused the teat of mothers. This usually happened during the first 2 years of childhood. However, sometimes, children didn't refuse the teat of mothers until age 6 or even beyond. Whenever children cried, mothers first breastfed the milk-dependent child, and after that, if the child continued to cry, the need was diagnosed and then met.

Whenever children under age 6 were out and about with mothers in public, they were wrapped up next to the bosom of mothers in swaddling blankets, in mammary closeness. The swaddling blankets were tied to the left breast, and then across the dot to the right leg, or vice versa, or both in the case of twins. From there, swaddling blankets - and the child with them - were tucked underneath the loose-fitting, revealing dress worn by mothers that resembled an apron. Whenever children cried, they were held even closer to mom's bosom in mammary closeness. The swaddling blankets were made of velvet, which was grown throughout the Ancient Middle East.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!

Punitive parenting: Why parents are to avoid punitive measures with children

Many parents think that the Bible allows for, or even commands, punitive measures in dealing with children. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents have not fully read their Bible, or else they would be singing a different tune. The Bible, when understood in context, prohibits all forms of punitive parenting.

The Greek root word denoting parental entitlement is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, wanting things from children, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, parental entitlement is a parent being sorely disappointed when they don't get what they feel that they deserve from children. Parents are deserving of absolutely nothing from children just for existing. All parent anger directed towards children in biblical times was deemed parental entitlement. When this sense of entitlement was perceived by children as offensive or damaging, it was deemed child abuse. See also Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of offenses or damages stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon..

The Greek root word translated "they be discouraged" in the Bible is αθυμέω (Latin: athumeo) and refers to long-term damages, with these damages usually amounting to trauma. Atheism was seen in biblical times as a sign of trauma, not a way of being "vindictive" towards believers. 

Punitive parenting was defined in biblical times as any parenting motivated by anger. Most Christian parents in the Early Church instead were motivated by worry or concern. Parent anger towards children was seen in biblical times as akin to a viper striking out at a child. Under customary law, parents were only allowed anger when protecting a child.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!