Time-in: Why mammary closeness is the biblical way of doing time-in

Many parents these days are switching to time-out over spanking or other forms of punishment. Most parents oppose time-in as a means of dealing with a crying or upset child. There are many ways to do time-in. However, the fact of the matter is that there is one biblical way of doing time-in, when using the context as a guidepost.

Time-in is a part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:34-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children one last time. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

There are many ways to do time-in. However, only one method is biblical - mammary closeness. Whenever children cried, mothers cooed before picking up the child. From there, mom diagnosed the need, then meeting that need. Maybe the child was tired. Maybe the child was hungry. Maybe the child needed mom's milk. Maybe the child needed mom, period.

Mothers usually gave skin-on-skin comfort to children when they cried. This skin-on-skin mammary closeness usually came in the form of birth nudity between mother and child. Children went naked wherever they went, with mothers going naked in the confines of the family home. Children, when they were tired, they were co-snuggled next to mom in skin-on-skin format, in skin-on-skin mammary closeness.

A big part of mammary closeness is breastfeeding. Whenever children were milk-hungry, they cried out loud for mothers to attend to them. Most of the time, breastfeeding ended at age 2, which was when the child rejected the teat of the mother. However, some of the time, breastfeeding didn't end until age 6 or even later. Christian mothers in the Early Church were allowed to breastfeed anywhere when called to do so, including in public. 

Most men sexualize the bosom of women. However, the bosom of mothers was not intended primarily as something to sexualize, but instead is a way for mothers to nurture children. Skin-on-skin mammary closeness is a short way into attachment parenting. Once you as a mother snuggle up next to your child in skin-on-skin format, you will regret doing it sooner. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!