Time-in: Why mammary closeness is the biblical way of doing time-in

Many parents think that children deserve time-out or spanking when they cry. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents punish children. However, more and more parents are opting for time-in. There are many ways that time-in is done, but only one pertaining to the Bible and its context - mammary closeness.

Mammary closeness is the ultimate expression of mutual submission between parent and children. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to secure attachment between parents and children in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to their children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40; 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

There are many ways of doing time-in, including things such as kneeling down to the child or sending the child to a calming corner. However, there is one biblical way to do time-in - mammary closeness. Whenever a child cried in the Early Church, mothers were quick to coo at their children and then pick them up. From there, she diagnosed the need and met it. Maybe the child was tired. Maybe the child was hungry. Maybe the child needed mom's milk. Maybe the child needed mom, period. Whatever the need was, mothers knew how to meet the child's need. When children were picked up, they were held close to the mother's bosom in mammary closeness.

Part of mammary closeness is breastfeeding. A child needs to be breastfed until they refuse to latch onto the teat of mothers. In most cases, around age 2, children refused the teat of mothers. However, sometimes, the refusal didn't happen until age 6, or even older in remote cases. When your child cries, it is good to offer the child the teat, and if they take you up on the offer, breastfeed your child to sleep. In biblical times, mothers breastfed their children in public, without any fear of scandal from breastfeeding in public.

Mammary closeness happened in public as well as in private. Children under age 6 were wrapped up by mothers next to their bosom in swaddling blankets when in public. From there, swaddling blankets - and the child with them - were tucked underneath the loose-fitting, revealing dress worn by mothers that resembled an apron. The swaddling blankets were tied to the left breast, and then across the dot to the right leg, or else vice versa, or else both in the case of twins. When children cried, mothers held them closer to her bosom, breastfeeding the child if milk-hungry. The swaddling blankets were made of velvet, with velvet growing throughout the Ancient Middle East.

Cooing coming from mothers is a primal vocalization intended to put children at ease. When mothers cooed at their children, the loud tears turned to silent tears, with children feeling heard by their mothers. Cooing at children, in most cases, came with picking up the child, and offering them the teat if they are still milk-dependent.

The breasts of women were not intended primarily as a means of sexualizing women. Mothers have breasts in order to nurture their children. Once a mother does this once, she will then know that she should have bonded with her child like that sooner. Mammary closeness is the deepest form of intimacy between mothers and children.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!