Children first, parents last: Understanding how to love your child (the right way)

Many parents think that their needs come first, and that their children's needs come last. "Parents first" is a common motto for parents in this country. Most parents in America think highly of their parenting, and don't want criticism. Most, however, need to be judged badly, as they reek of parental entitlement. God has set His priorities. Children come first, and parents come last. That is God's order, and will be until the end of time. 

Christian love for children, in the New Testament, is denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao) and refers to, in the context of parenting, prioritizing children first, and yourself last, to the point of dutiful and selfless submission to children as one would God (see Matt. 22:35-40). True Love does not come from pride or desire, but from fearful conviction, where parents are convicted of the fact that they are depraved and decadent sinners who are deserving of absolutely nothing in relation to children. This creates a feeling of worthlessness in the sinner/parent, prompting the sinner/parent to earn their worth by doing good works for their children. In turn, children rest safely and securely in the love and submission of parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children as they would God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Parents are to submit to their children from beneath, yet from above, revering their children as extensions of God.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up this legal context in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

Parents are to be submissive to their children, just as they are to God. Children in biblical times were seen as extensions of God, meaning installments and sentries of God, called to judge righteously the charity and good will of adults towards the poor and the vulnerable, which included children in biblical times. Children were seen as having a deity of their own, that was representative of part of God's personality. Children were seen as little gods and goddesses reigning over their parents, issuing righteous demands, with parents seeking to win favor with said deities, thus being brought to full and dutiful submission by their children. Children were seen as bondservants to the deity of children, working for a lump sum which is instilling independence and self-reliance in children. Children got most of what they wanted, and everything that they needed.

Children, in biblical times, wore absolutely no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude, in order to serve both their husbands and their children. Mothers served their children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely attachment parenting items such as breastfeeding and skin-on-skin comfort. Children up until age 6 never left their mother's side, ranging beside her in the family home, being swaddled to her bosom in swaddling clothing when out and about. When night came, mothers co-slept next to children, in order to guard for predators of all kinds, including sexual predators in the home. Fathers formed a secure attachment to children by way of witnessing skin-on-skin closeness between mother and child, usually in the form of a sexual attachment that was restrained using masturbatory fantasy.

Parents are to submit to children from beneath, yet from above. This means God prioritizes children over any adult, due to children being the "least of these". Christian love prioritizes the needs of its subject, in this case children, above the needs of the individual in love, in this case parents. This means that parents should take effort to put themselves last in the family home, and prioritize their children first. This sort of selflessness comes only from a place of fearful conviction, where the parent declares themselves a depraved and decadent sinner, knowing that they are deserving of absolutely nothing in relation to their children, and thus their children deserve everything from them.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!