Proverbs 13:24: Why the Bible does not allow for spanking or punishment

Many people think the Bible commands spanking or punishment as a means to discipline or control a child. This is a common mistake that parents make, thinking that there is biblical basis for their punishment habit imposed on their children. The fact of the matter is that the Bible nowhere legitimately says to strike or punish a child. Proverbs 13:24 is a commonly used verse to defend child punishment. Let's do an exegesis on this verse together.

It says in Proverbs 13:24 KJV:

He that spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

The Hebrew root word translated "rod" is שֵׁבֶט (Latin: shebet) and refers not to a shepherd's rod, like progressive child advocates would say, but, in the context of Proverbs, a switch wielded by a father in a courtroom setting. The Hebrew root word translated "son" is בִֵ׀ (Latin: ben) and refers here to an ADULT son. 

There are two layers of interpretation for a Proverbs verse like this, literal and figurative. Literally speaking, the verse refers to the rod of correction, which was a rod of legal correction used to carry out the summary sentence for adult males convicted of a capital offense under Jewish law. This whipping consisted of 40 minus 1 lashes to the bare back. This legal punishment was a final warning that, if the criminal behavior was to continue, the offender would be put to death immediately. If the offender survived the whipping, he was given a second chance at life. Doesn't all hardship in life give us that second chance like the 40 minus 1 lashes did for capital offenders in Ancient Israel? This is what the figurative meaning of Prov. 13:24 and all related verses is - that no matter how hard life may be in the moment, you will get through it, and then God gives you a second chance at life, just like He did for capital offenders in Ancient Israel many times. Proverbs is poetry, not prose, and should not be taken at face value. You can get a lot of wisdom from Proverbs, but you have to understand the Audience in which it was written to. Children were never whipped in the Bible, even in the Old Testament, nor were they punished. Adult descendants of fathers were whipped, for repeatedly engaging in criminal activity - there is no Hebrew word for "descendant", and so the Bible reads to the English-speaking reader as "child" or "children". Basically, the rod verses are a recommendation to Jewish and Christian parents alike to not shield their adult children from life's hardships. Minor children were surely shielded from the harshness of life, due to being in the providing custody of parents, but parents were allow their adult descendants to face hardship on their own, prevailing with an independent spirit, thereby encouraging individual responsibility in children.

The rod of correction was seen in the Hebrew language and Jewish culture of the time as a symbol of life's stressors and hardships, meaning if you went through a rough patch in life, you really got whipped, if you were to directly translate the Hebrew into English. Some Jewish sects still use this sort of language to speak of life's hardships. This is known as rod language among the Jewish people. This symbolism was closely connected to the doctrine of original sin in both Christianity and Judaism. When I am in a difficult place in life, I sometimes imagine being whipped by God, and in that symbolic instance, I deserve it just for existing. I know full well God does not literally come down with a rod and discipline His children, but He does discipline us. God hands down to us hardships to make us stronger as human beings. This, in the time of Solomon, was wisdom handed down from father to son.

All forms of punitive parenting, including punishment and controlling demeanor, are banned in the Bible. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all punitive parenting, including any punishment or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children too many times. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" referring to any damages or offense stemming from hostage-taking - punishing children was seen as holding them hostage for things they did wrong. Paul was lifting up this historical legal context to a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. The teaching of "biblical spanking" does not come from the Bible, but from the absorption of punitive Greco-Roman parenting customs into the Roman Catholic Church, with the Catholic Church pandering to European pagan cultures who whipped and beat their children. There was no custom to punish a child at all among the Early Christians, who were persecuted largely based on the group libel that they were too "soft" on their children. The Early Christians made no attempt to hide the warmth and love poured out to children in their homes, oftentimes not defending themselves against persecution for their parenting beliefs tied to their Christian faith. There is no excuse - punishing a child at all is antithetical to the teachings of both Jesus Christ and the Apostle Paul. Paul himself was very much anti-spanking, as most Jews of his day were. Spanking and punishment of children are a Roman incursion onto our Christian faith.

Parents in the Bible did not spank or punish their children. Attachment parenting was mandated under Jewish customary law in the Old Testament, and Christian ordinance in the Early Church. Parenting then was a special, distinct form of attachment parenting where children were deified as extensions of God. A child's every cry and demand for needs was seen as a lawful and binding order, with God extending children to their parents in His image for nourishment and comfort. Mothers breastfed their children until age 3, and held their children close beside them until age 6. Children never left the line of sight of parents, right up until adulthood. Children were allowed to play freely, but only within the line of sight of parents. The Greek root word υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) lifts up the attachment parenting context for the relevance of all. See Col. 3:20 and Eph. 6:1. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!