Discipline: Why children don't need it (parents do)

Many parents think children need discipline, and cite the Bible as a source for their claim of such. This is a common misconception about children and Scripture alike. Children do not need to be disciplined. They need a good example that depicts discipline and self-control to children.

The Apostle Paul wrote in Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor thy father and mother, as this is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long upon the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to a specific Christian standard of discipline in parents in relation to children, namely one that is entitled to nothing, but grateful for everything, especially in relation to children. Children owe nothing in relation to parents, and parents owe everything in relation to children, expecting absolutely nothing from children, with this giving them a good chastened up example for them to follow, backed up by the rare instruction as a righteous test - parents can give a child instructions when what they want is unsafe or unattainable, but when the child does not listen, it is to be assumed that they can't understand the instruction due to age and development, and the parent should focus on keeping their child safe, as denoted by the Greek root word translated "admonition" which is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to instruction in the Lord, meaning as a righteous test to see if a child is able to listen given their brain size and shape. This is all weighed by the Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul to lift up the Law on punishment of children, which carried severe penalties in biblical times, being seen as deserving of death in the Old Testament, and a Hell-able offense in the New Testament. The rod verses are repealed verses, meaning they are only relevant to the culture and legal system to which they were written to. These verses refer to a dated form of judicial corporal punishment specifically conflated with the death penalty in ancient Israel - the 40 minus 1 lashes with the rod of correction, as a final warning after an ADULT child was sentenced to death. Minor children could not be charged with any criminal act or civil wrong, as they could not stand trial. Parent anger is a weapon in a courtroom exchange, and children cannot legally stand trial in the exchange, as their parents have to testify on their behalf.

What makes a child want to listen to the instructions of parents? Christian love is the answer, meaning putting children first, and parents last, to the point of dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every need, leading to a form of restful surrender, which is denoted by the English word "obey" and the corresponding Greek root word υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents, with children feeling safe and secure in relation to parents, being able to tell them anything and everything under the sun, expecting absolutely no punishment or reprisal in return. Children should be able to order parents around, demanding their every need. Attachment parenting was the norm in ancient Israel and adjoining churches. Think a mother holding pales of water, with a young child being held next to her bosom, and an older child held on her back, with both children in the nude, with mother gathering water to drink and to cook food with.

Most behaviors that children are punished for in the United States are developmentally appropriate behaviors. Such behaviors should be seen by the parent as a phase, and either left go or attended to with empathy. A child cries when they need something, regardless of age. Older children demand things when they need something, and usually, wants are either the same as need or point to a need. 

The idea is to allow children to absorb the example of parents at their own pace. Children won't get your example right away, but eventually, they will as teenagers and young adults, making milestones along the way. When you punish a child, you don't extinguish a behavior - you simply make them comply when you are around to supervise. Children learn at their own pace. A good example for a child is the Living Example of Christ, namely the example Christ gave to His Church, which was one that was entitled to nothing, but grateful for everything. When giving instructions, know that most of the time, children don't listen because they can't understand what the instructions given, due to age and development, namely brain size and shape. A young child's brain is not fully grown, so they won't internalize the moral example of a parent, and won't be able to understand instructions that they can't understand due to their developmental level. Children aren't being defiant when they don't listen - they simply cannot understand what is being asked of them, in which case the parent should simply supervise and keep the child safe.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger through punishment will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!