Why temper tantrums are not bad behavior

Many parents hate temper tantrums in children. Most parents in America see temper tantrums as bad behavior, oftentimes citing the Bible as a reason to punish and control a child for their emotions. However, the Bible prohibits all punishment and control of children, and nowhere condemns temper tantrums in children.

Every single parent and adult is guilty in relation to children, and is deserving of DEATH and DESTRUCTION merely for existing in relation to children, with parents/adults being meek and shamefaced in relation to children, with adults shut up by the Lord in relation to children, letting the children speak, then only speaking to children with consent and cue. Parents especially are to put children first, and themselves last, leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every need, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the love and grace of parents. See Colossians 3:20-21

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of children, with children expressing their every emotion, confiding into parents anything and everything under the sun, demanding and ordering parents around, policing them for their every need. Attachment parenting was the norm in biblical times. Think a mother holding pales of water, wearing head garb, with her young child wrapped up next to her bosom, with an older child, in the nude, in tow next to her. True biblical parenting is very primitive, as ancient Israel and the Early Church both were attachment parenting societies. Throwing a temper tantrum was not stifled or discouraged by parents then, as children were allowed to develop without adult interference.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages under the Law, cross-referencing the Eighth Commandment. This means the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including the slightest of offensive touch and contact perceived by the child. Paul here is lifting up the Law on punishment and control such as spanking and other forms of corporal punishment. Punishing minor children was dealt with severely under the Law, with punitive parents in the Old Testament being hung like poultry, in bloodletting format. Punitive parents in the New Testament were excommunicated from Christian churches. Corporal punishment did exist in the Bible, as stated in Proverbs, but the verses that depict it are repealed. Corporal punishment then was judicial in nature, meaning a sentence for a crime, with this crime being a capital offense. Fathers were appointed by the state to administer 40 minus 1 lashes with the rod of correction as a final warning before an offender was put to death on the spot, after a criminal trial in the Sanhedrin. Minor children could not be charged with a criminal offense or civil wrong under the Law, as they were deemed unable to form the necessary entitlement to further an offense. Damages against children included the slightest of offense perceived by the child, and so when the child was accidentally upset by the word "no", parents would show their lack of entitlement by reassuring to the child and validating their upset, as a means of apology for offending or upsetting them. Simply state "I'm here to listen" or "I'm here" when a child cries. "It's okay" is too invalidating, as it obviously isn't okay for the child.

Temper tantrums are a child's way of communicating. First through cries, then whining, then sulking and talking back. A child does not have the language skills nor the impulse control to "be civil" when demanding a need. Children live in the same world as us, with their reality being as complex as ours as adults, but they don't have the words for what they want to say. Mix this with poor impulse control, and you get a mess of tears and tantrums. Furthermore, wants are related to needs, meaning when a child wants something, they aren't far off from what they need. A child's basic needs consist of food, water, shelter, transportation, and attachment - with attachment being the greatest of needs. When a child makes an outlandish request, they want it from YOU and see it as a sign of your love. If you can afford candy in the store, just get it for them - they're only little once. Anything bought for a child comes from YOU. That's all they see (they obviously don't get money at a young age, right?). Or, if you can't afford that bicycle, spend some quality time with your child.

The idea of attachment parenting is to watch your child develop naturally, with only necessary interference to keep your child safe and sound. Children develop naturally in some ways, and by following example in other ways. The proper way to deal with children isn't behaviorism, but self-behaviorism in parents. It all starts with stifling anger at children, including during temper tantrums, and stifling anger in other parts of one's life as well, saving anger for the exchange. The Greek root word παιδεία (Latin: paideia) refers to the specific form of Christian discipline that is entitled to nothing, and grateful for everything, modeled to children as the Living Example of Christ. Parents in the Early Church modeled to children a Christ-like example. Parents were not allowed to issue legal orders to minor children, but simply offer advice and guidance. 

Parents in biblical times related to their children on an equal level, with fathers having connotational sexual attachments to their children, namely their daughters usually. These attachments, when centered in a non-entitled way, prompted Christian fathers to be selfless like a human ragdoll, motivated by sexual attachment, like "sun tan" spray on a child, with children then being nude all the time to show their vulnerability, given their clothing once becoming an adult. Mothers were also selfless, nourishing children with breastmilk for as long as they would take it, then wrapping them up in their bosom with swaddling blankets. 

Children who threw tantrums in biblical times were immediately held close to mothers in co-mingling format, including even older children, with children clinging to mothers when they felt unsafe or unheard, and then Christian mothers listened and validated upset, never judging or punishing children for their feelings. Older children then went off to play, alternating between closeness and free play. Children under age 6 were in constant closeness with mothers, with fathers standing by to protect with his rod and staff. Some of the context in this post may not be able to be applied as is, but most all of it is applicable.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! There is a grand investigation being conducted by we Christians, and if you are not on the side of children, you are not on the side of God! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!