Respect in parenting: Why parents must respect their children first

Many parents in this country think children should respect them, and that parents have the "right" to demand respect from children. However, the fact of the matter is that the burden of proof of respect is on the parents, not the child.

Every single parent and adult is guilty in relation to children, and are deserving of DEATH and DESTRUCTION merely for existing in relation to children, with parents/adults being meek and shamefaced in relation to children. Parents especially are to put their children first, and themselves last, leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return from children or others, with children resting securely and safely in parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parenting, with children owing nothing in return to parents for being allowed respite. This references the attachment parenting context of the Bible, whereas attachment parenting was the norm in ancient Israel and the Early Church. Think a Christian mother holding pales of water, with a young child wrapped up in her bosom with swaddling clothing donned by the mother, with an older child, in the nude, in tow next to her mother, with both children feeling safe and secure in the love and grace of mother, with fathers befriending children, particularly when they are older, in a passive yet respectful friendship. This was how children surrendered in biblical times - into the loving arms of parents.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages. This means the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including the slightest of offensive touch or contact. This commandment was given by the Apostle Paul when he was in prison for being a Christian, and lifts up the Law on punishing children, meaning it was prohibited then. Punishment or controlling measures towards children were dealt with severely under the Law, with the punishment of a child deemed to be kidnapping, a capital offense in the Old Testament punishable by bloodletting (hanging parents up like poultry). All seven of the verses in Proverbs that depict the rod of correction are repealed verses, meaning they are only relevant to the legal system of the time, with all of the verses referring to the 40 minus 1 lashes with the rod of correction, as a last warning before an ADULT child was put to death for committing crimes repeatedly, with many warnings beforehand. The rod of correction is also mentioned in Heb. 12:5-11, where it is a figurative, symbolic mention of the rod, which was a figure of speech in ancient Hebrew culture for enduring hardship, and the reap of rewards at the end. We all know God does not literally scourge His children, but He does put them through trials and tribulations, like no human parent can do. 

Respect must be earned in life, as there is no free ride, even if you are a parent to a child. Respect for parents, in the form of honoring and venerating parents, doesn't come until the child is older, perhaps not until they are an adult. Before then, YOU must model respect to them by treating them with respect. This means allowing children to rest in your loving arms, with child surrender being children surrendering into the loving arms of parents, not owing anything in return to parents for being allowed respite. 

Parenting is giving without receiving, and receiving perhaps the honest demands of your child, and then you have to just give in and give up, ceasing the battle with children. Rest in parents is not always calm for the parent. It is a rest that empowers children to self-advocate for their own needs and redress of grievances. 

Children in ancient Israel and adjoining churches were demanding towards their parents, issuing orders and decrees as to what they needed and to issue a redress of grievances towards their parents, with parents convicted of their child's vulnerability, and the child being in place of God, and the parents being the extension of Christ serving God through their child. Parents in that culture feared and revered their children, enough to be convicted of their needs, putting the needs of children first, and that of parents last.

Respecting children will lead them to absorb your example better. Punishment causes a false fail-safe that goes away when children are adults. Children naturally absorb the values of their parents, and don't need punishment to learn values. They just internalize it, and absorb it all. Children should be able to be allowed to develop on their own accord, at their own pace.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Many will be called to be Christian parents, but few will be chosen as saints, and WE few attached parents are the saints. Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!