Why parents should not have expectations

Many parents expect things from children. It is expected in society to have expectations for children. "I want" is an expectation of a child, usually. But isn't "I want" entitlement? When imposed, yes.

The Tenth Commandment is written in Exodus 20:17 KJV:

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.

The Greek root word translated "lachmod" is לחמוד (Latin: lachmod) and refers here to wanting things from children to the point of seeking to impose said want onto a child, leading to theft/abuse by offense perceived by a child. This is repeated and expanded upon by the Greek root word for entitlement in the Bible, which is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers to the imposition of want on others as a personality trait, which starts with want imposed on children. 

Entitlement can include wanting anything for a child as an expectation. Expectations are different than preferences. If you have a preference for your child, you can work to make it happen, by doing work in relationship with your child, earning respect with them, thus winning them over with anything else. Expectations imply coercive intent in parenting, thus entitlement.

Your relationship with your child is defined by God. It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest and trust in the love and grace of parents, coming from sacrificing for children, in the spirit that Christ sacrificed for His children; taking up the cross for your child, in the spirit that Christ took up the cross for your children; martyring yourself in everything in parenting, expecting absolutely nothing in return. The Greek root word υπακουο ultimately uplifts the Judeo-Christian parenting traditions of the Bible, which are attachment-based in nature. Child nudity was legal and accepted in the biblical context, and the reason was so that mothers could bond with their children with skin-to-skin contact, as mothers wore no clothing in the home. Children as old as 3 being treated behaviorally as infants, and breastfed as such. Children co-slept with their mothers at night until adulthood, with mothers and daughters being inseparable.

The Greek root word translated "parents" is γονεύς (Latin: goneus) and refers to parents not as authority figures, but as servants and caregivers for children. Parents weren't lawgivers who issued high expectations, but caregivers who set a good example. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to "stirring up" upset or resentment in children, referencing the Jewish adage of "stirring the pot" in terms of your child's emotional well-being. High expectations can "stir the pot". You can want anything in a child, but in order for it to happen, you have to work for it by selling that idea to them, and in order for that to happen, there needs to be respect from children, and that comes from vulnerable trust in parents that is earned. 

Instead of having expectations, state preferences and then act them out as an example. If you are a slovenly dressed drunk, don't expect your child to become a Fortune 500 CEO, and if you punish them, chances are they will turn out much like you, in a way you hate, making you a hypocritical parent. If you want your child to act like Christ, YOU act like Christ and be their savior, taking up the cross for them like Christ did, or else don't complain and live in sin. Children take up the example of their parents, so Christian parents should act like Christ did, sacrificing for their children like Christ did for His children, rendering themselves vulnerable like Christ did, treating children with the respect they want to be treated, in the form of mutual submission. If children aren't respected, they can't be expected to respect their parents, and expectations that push children to the limit are a disrespect to children everywhere.

Let the depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death, which is Satan's final resting place! Let the evildoing parents descend into a Hell of fire and torment, with God's anger being relentless towards them! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!