Respect in parenting: Why parents should respect children first

Most parents want respect from their children. However, very few want to earn it. Most parents don't care about or respect children, and hate them. Rome reversed it. Respect for children is reverent, and children for parents borne of closeness.

This is the doctrine of mutual submission. It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest and trust in the provisions of parents, being able to be themselves in relation to parents, being able to tell parents anything, channeling the rambunctious energy of children to the presence of parents, with parents being safe people for the needs and emotions of children. Respect for parents is closeness earned by the sacrifice of parents, in the spirit that Christ sacrificed for His children. In ancient Israel and adjoining churches, child nudity was legal and accepted, and that was because mothers treated children with skin-to-skin contact, also being unclothed when in the home. Closeness was the goal for Hebrew parents, and then respect was earned. Policing attachment was the most common form of closeness to parents in the Bible, with children making demands and orders as to their needs, through crying when younger, and giving spoken orders to parents when older. Parents were struck with reverent fear, leading to conviction to surrender to the every vulnerable need of children, expecting absolutely nothing in return from children, being and feeling grateful for the fruits of their toil and labor. Children did not owe anything to parents, but nonetheless listened anyway out of gratitude and thanksgiving for the respect given to them by parents. Parents are to respect children first, then vice versa, with earned closeness from children.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and literally translates to "stirring up" upset and resentment in children, referencing the Jewish adage of "stirring the pot" regarding your child's emotional welfare. This was, in fact, a direct command from God through the Apostle Paul prohibiting corporal punishment, and other forms of punishment and harshness as well, cracking down on members of the Colossian church of Hellenistic origin who were being punitive with their children. The Law actually forbade striking a child out of punishment, and deemed it kidnapping - it was a capital offense in the Old Testament, and one of the more well-enforced criminal statutes under the Law. The Apostle Paul handed out parenting manuals educating parents on attachment parenting, which was the Judeo-Christian tradition of the time, with the Christian parenting then based on the concept of imparting a Christ-like example, based on His sacrifice and His generosity, to children by sacrificing as a parent and treating them with the same charity and generosity that Christ treated His children with. Any punishment or harshness is prohibited under biblical law, meaning the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child victim. The rod of correction in the biblical context refers to an instrument of judicial corporal punishment, meaning a tree branch. The father was appointed by the state as an accessory to an investigation by the religious authorities, meting out 40 minus 1 lashes in the courtroom to his adult son who violated the Law, as a warning that the next offense would lead to death. Christ abolished all capital and corporal punishment by enduring it. The Early Christian churches did not practice capital or corporal punishment as church discipline, except when agreed upon between spouses. Anger was not allowed to be expressed outside of court in the biblical context, and children could not stand trial for anything they did that could be considered immoral, in both the Old and New Testaments.

Respect is earned in life, meaning not handed to you by your children on a silver platter. Respect from your child will not come in the form of reverence. Parents and adults are to revere children and their needs, and surrender to them. Respect for parents is a feeling of closeness leading to surrender out of trust, clinging to parents, cradled by them, co-sleeping next to them. Respect for parents is not fear. Respect for children is reverent fear in avoidance of wronging one's own child, knowing that one has wronged their child merely for existing in relation to them, resigning to the needs of their children, knowing how ignorant they really are about their child's needs, allowing children to be the boss of their own needs.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger through punishment and disrespect will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into ever-burning fire of Hell and torment! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!