"Honor parents": What the Fifth Commandment really means

Many parents believe that they are deserving of respect, and demand it from children based on that. Honoring parents, however, is not what it is widely understood as, as a concept. Honor from children is earned, not served for free on a silver platter from children. 

It says in Exodus 20:12 KJV:

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God hath giveth thee.

This commandment actually rescued children from punishment, especially the last part, meaning that before the Ten Commandments, Canaanite law allowed for fathers to kill their children for whatever offense they saw fit. Under the new Mosaic Law, parents had to go through the court system. "Honor" in this case refers to family honor, in first-to-last fashion, meaning a stubborn and rebellious son didn't just make parents look bad out of "meaningless honorifics", but that children must have learned to be angry at everything from somewhere, and thus the parents look bad because they look like abusers. No child was executed merely for rebelling against a child, as the parents were pressured by the rest of the family, meaning extended family in this cultural context, to recant what was basically an allegation of elder abuse. That is what "stubborn and rebellious son" meant - not "back talk" but a form of abuse of parents, meaning a delinquent young man.

It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things, as is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest and trust in parents, being able to be oneself in relation to children, being able to tell parents anything, not owing anything in return to parents, yet nonetheless with children showing gratitude by listening to the voice of parents, because they are reassured and not because they fear punishment from parents. This comes from Christian love for children, meaning being convicted with reverent fear and terror, leading to parents surrendering to God through their child, sacrificing for their children, taking up the cross just like Christ sacrificed for His children, shielding them from blame, rendering oneself beneath one's child, devaluing oneself as a caregiver or servant to the child, leading to good works and then gratitude for such, expecting absolutely nothing in return. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to the offenses in the legal context of the Bible, and uplifts the torts and damages system under the Eighth Commandment, including assault and battery laws that extended support to children, repeated and summed up in the New Testament as the slightest of offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitled behavior and attitudes from adults. This is the concept of mutual submission, meaning parents and children submit to each other and respect each other, with parents carrying the burden of providing, and children simply resting without responsibility.

Ancient Israel and adjoining churches supported attachment parenting, meaning children were swaddled next to their parents, held close in skin-to-skin contact with their mother until age 3 by bands tied around the mother's body. This was for children up to age 3, with even older children playing freely in close range to parents, also sleeping next to mothers in particular, with parents not even thinking of putting their hands on a child or even raising their voice to them abusively. Punitive parenting was not the norm in ancient Israel, so much that there didn't need to be any specific commandment given to the ancient Jews against it. The commandment not to provoke children to anger was the Apostle Paul warning fathers of rebellious children that their punitive attitudes towards their children were being reflected in their rebellion, meaning your child is a reflection of you, based on how you treat them. The Greco-Roman culture then supported the punishment of children, whereas Jewish law then forbade it.

The depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God! They will instead be condemned to the lake of burning fire and brimstone, which is the second death prepared for Satan and His accomplices! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!