Child surrender - And why secure attachment is necessary to earn cooperation with children

Many people think parents in the biblical context were strict on their children, meaning punitive parents, thus children are to surrender once their will is broken. The reality is that child surrender is reliant on parent submission to the child.

Parents need to earn their cooperation with children, with parents being struck with reverent terror for the every need of their child, being convicted to surrender to God through one's child, giving up one's adult power and control to the footstool of children, sacrificing for one's child, taking up the cross just as Christ took up the cross for His children, rendering oneself beneath one's child, devaluing oneself as her caregiver and servant, leading to good works for the sake of good works, expecting absolutely nothing in return, but grateful for everything good done for children, and the fact that they exist as your child. This describes Christian love, as denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao).

Parents are to render themselves to a selfless level smaller than their children, for being bigger and more powerful, thereby selflessly degrading themselves righteously, shielding their child from guilt or shame, taking the blame and responsibility themselves, being struck with conviction of peaceable and orderly behavior towards a child, in a selfless manner that listens to and validates the every upset of a child, modeling selflessness and self-control to parents.

The mutual submission doctrine of parenting is stated in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things, as is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to providing custody, meaning rest in the providence of parents, with parents supplying the every demand of a child, with children being able to be oneself in relation to parents, owing absolutely nothing in relation to parents, yet nonetheless showing gratitude and thanksgiving by way of listening to the voice of parents, in a reassuring manner, like a gentle nudge. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to "stirring up" a child's anger, namely "stirring the pot" in terms of child anger or upset, referring to the offenses under the Eighth Commandment, namely the slightest of offense perceived by a child, including corporal punishment, known as the slightest of unwanted touch perceived by a child from a parent. 

Children were seen as autonomous in ancient Israel, meaning not extensions of their parents. Parents simply had an affinity with their children, in the form of pro-social child worship, meaning seeing children in relation to their needs as legal extensions of God, striking terror in parents. Mothers especially were beholden to children, with infants up to age 3 swaddled next to mothers, with children older than that playing in close range to mother, with father standing by in a protective manner, with the staff he held meant to show headship, and also beat any intruders with it. Children were allowed to demand their needs as loudly or pushy as they wished, with parents supplying the every demand of their child, selflessly, with children then surrendering out of gratitude and thanksgiving for the selfless care.

Parents then were securely attached to their children, and vice versa, meaning parent and child were attached at the hip, and pals in the case of fathers. Secure attachment is the healthiest form of attachment possible in parenting, meaning the closest. It refers to children listening with compliance not out of fear, but out of fondness and affection in one's parents, seeing them as safe people to deposit emotions onto, with parents simply being selfless in that regard. Attached activities might just be going places, going out to eat, and so forth in a way that builds a secure bond between parent and child.

The depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God, and will descend forever into the abyss that is eternal Hell-fire! They will be cast away into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for the evil one and his accomplices! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!