Why the Bible bans all control in a parent-child relationship

 Many people in this country oppose spanking as a punishment for children. 94% of parents are physically violent to their children, to varying ages - even as old as age 17 (around 20%) - and 70% of parents support the use of force in parenting. Many of our parenting norms are based on religious teachings of the the Christian variety. America is a Christian nation, founded on Christian family values, including anti-entitlement values that oppose demanding things, or throwing tantrums or anger fits when things don't go your way...Children first, parents last. That is God's order until the end of time.

It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things, as is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "children" is τεκνον (Latin: teknon) and refers to dependence on parents, with parents being defined by the Greek root word γόνευς (Latin: goneus) and means allowing children to lead you to their needs, in martyrdom fashion, submitting and surrendering yourself to the authority that is the child and her needs, as an indentured servant and bondslave. Parenting, in ancient Jewish culture, was attachment-based in nature, with children staying with parents until age 6 in the case of boys, and age 12 in the case of girls. Punishing a child was illegal under Jewish law, as striking anyone outside a court of law was unlawful, and children under the age of majority were not legally competent to stand trial. If a young child couldn't stand trial, they could never be punished. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to pain, shame, stolen goods, defamation of honor, fornication, and other legal damages motivated by parental entitlement.

Ever felt that your child was being manipulative or controlling? Check your own behavior around your child, and towards your child. Do you manipulate or control, in your actions or attitudes? If so, know that children mirror the attitudes of their parents, and often throw it right back at them. This is what the Apostle Paul was warning about, to Colossian fathers of Greco-Roman heritage, whose culture believed in beating wives and children "within reason". Jewish law then did not allow physical discipline of a wife without it being part of the marriage contract, which was rare. Striking a child at all was illegal, as legal persons were autonomous, with children being in providing custody. Providing custody is a first-to-last power of attorney guaranteeing children legal rights and control over their needs from parents, with parents having duties towards children, instead of rights over their children. Picture a tugboat pulling a ship, symbolizing children guiding parents to what they need, instead of telling children what they need, in the form of antisocial "assume"/"advice". 

Any sort of control in any relationship is abuse, and thus is sin. Parents are not allowed, under Christian law, to control their children. They must model control to their children, as noted by the Greek root word παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and backed up lightly by the Greek root word νουθεσια (Latin: nouthesia), meaning admonishing a child, meaning gently correcting them in a non-violent, non-abusive manner. Use your words to admonish, and use then gently yet firmly...Don't control your child. Teach self-contol.

The depraved and entitled parents/adults/school personnel who punish children and/or spoil them will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Gentle, non-violent parents will persevere as God's chosen elect of parents, and the rest shall perish. Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!