Child discipline: How to discipline your child (without punishment or force)

Many parents think that discipline means punishment. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. However, there is a right way and a wrong way to discipline your child. The idea is to catch children in the act of being good.

God's Word states in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were initially charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents in the parish at Ephesus who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as deacon.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers here to a certain specific form of nurturing children, namely a teaching way of nurturing. In the Early Church, this nurturing came in the form of catching children being good, and then praising them for more of the same in terms of behavior. Parents modeled good behavior to their children, with this Christian example being backed up by praise and encouragement, as opposed to punishments or force. Children were also praised for following their religious beliefs. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to encouraging the religious development of children, with religion being a human need for children and adults alike. Whenever children were caught following their religious beliefs, they were given lavish praise and encouragement.

Catching children being good is a tradition in Jewish parenting, and was even a tradition back in the days of the biblical context. The role of fathers was to praise and encourage the good behavior in children, not punish bad behavior in children. The Early Church was an offshoot of Judaism, with no Jew worth mentioning ever endorsing punishing a child. 

It is a myth that fathers raped their children with "hand-me-down-the-slate" gaslighting in biblical times. Instead, mothers nurtured up close, and fathers nurtured from afar. The role of fathers in the Early Church was to discipline his children, but only through praise and encouragement. Other than that, the man of the house simply offered moral support to the woman of the house in the course of parenting.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!