Punitive parenting: Why punitive parenting is not the way to deal with childhood behaviors

Many parents think that the Bible prescribes punishment or force in parenting. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents cite the Bible to justify their punitive parenting habits. However, the fact of the matter is that punitive parenting, including punishment of all kinds, is prohibited in the Bible.

The Greek root word denoting parental entitlement is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, wanting things from children, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, parental entitlement is an adult being sorely disappointed when they don't get what they feel that they deserve from children. Adults are deserving of absolutely nothing from children just for existing. Adult anger towards children was deemed parental entitlement in all cases. When this sense of entitlement was perceived as offensive or damaging by a child, it was deemed child abuse. See also Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offense stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

Punitive parenting means any parenting that is fear-based. Most parenting in America is punitive in nature. In most American homes, children are frequently put in time-out, with there also being the occasional disciplinary spanking done "out of love". All of this is banned in the Bible, as it provokes offense in the child. Any time a child lives in fear of an adult, that is deemed child abuse.

Any anger towards a child was deemed parental entitlement in biblical times. Anger towards a child was seen as something not to expose a child to. Any anger towards a child was seen as akin to a viper lashing out at a child. Adult anger towards children was seen as something abhorrent, in a predatory way. Most parents then did not get angry at their children, and instead were motivated by worry and concern.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!