Christian attachment parenting: Why God endorses attachment parenting

Many parents think that the Bible is a pro-spanking document. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents instead punish and reprimand their children. However, the Bible, in\and of itself, is an attachment parenting document.

The Bible is America's book. The Bible is a founding document of this country, even more than the Constitution in and of itself. Most parents think that this founding context allows for punishments or other controlling demeanor towards children. However, nowhere in the Bible does it legitimately say to strike or punish a child. The 7 rod verses in Proverbs refer to the 40 minus 1 lashes, and only as a sentence for a crime, and only in a courtroom setting.

Attachment parenting was seen then in the form of mutual submission. See Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of children. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parents and children in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40; 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christians who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing, after punishing their children one last time. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to melding the countenance of children. In the Hebraic context, this could only mean one thing - lavishly praising and encouraging children when they were caught in the act of good behavior. Children learned good behavior through the good Christian example of parents. However, the good example of parents was backed up by praise and encouragement, instead of punishment or force. Children also need religious instruction, as religion is a human need for children adults alike. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to self-directed religious instruction. This religious instruction started with fathers putting out a Bible for children to discover and explore. Whenever children were caught in the act of reading the Bible, they were lavishly praised and encouraged with statements such as "that book is good for you". From there, religious instruction came in question and answer format. Whenever parents saw religion in their children, they received praise of the same. This praise and encouragement of religious behavior helped center the countenance of the child as they got older.

What motivates children to hear out the instruction of their fathers? How about start out with a secure attachment with mothers? For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers, meaning that wherever mothers went, so did her children. For the first 2 years of childhood, children were held constantly by mothers, either in her loving arms, or else on her back in a papoose bag when her hands were full. Children between ages 2-6 ranged next to mothers, following mothers from room to room, not allowing her out of their line of sight, morbidly fearing that mom will "go away and never come back". After age 6, children played outside freely, naked. Most of the time, children co-slept next to mothers in skin-on-skin format, with this co-sleeping sustaining warmth happening every night, until the onset of puberty, which is when children wanted their own place to sleep.

In the Early Church, mothers nurtured up close, and fathers nurtured from afar. This distance from fathers was due to a sexual attachment with his children, meaning men imprint on children by way of masturbating to sexual thoughts of said child. It is okay to look the look, and even think the think later. But, there is a big difference between thinking the think and doing the deed. The Greek root word denoting lust in the Bible is έπιθυμέω (Latin: epithumeo). This word does not refer to ordinary sexual desire, but instead to sexual entitlement. Sexual entitlement was defined as, officially speaking, sexual want, to the point of sexually motivated approach. If you find yourself doing the deed with a child, either by flirting or proposition a child, or else touching them anywhere on their body, maybe you shouldn't have approached a child. If the child is right there, you still should not attack the child with flirtation or other forms of sexual assault. The only way out of the approach is to masturbate with intent to discharge. Then, the rest is history...

For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers. But, when children got older, they were given lavish praise for things such as self-control and reading the Bible. Children, until then, were nurtured up close to mothers. When children picked up the Bible, and were caught reading it, they were lavishly praised and encouraged for discovering the Bible.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and burning sulfur, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!