Child punishment: Why to catch your child in the act of good behavior (as opposed to catching them behaving poorly)

Many parents want their children to have discipline. This is a common wish for parents to have regarding their children. However, parents usually go the wrong way about it. The  right way to discipline a child isn't punitive parenting, but rather involves praise and encouragement. 

Catching children in the act of good behavior was part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission. See Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παρορίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christians in the parish at Ephesus who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishment into the church. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers here to melding the countenance of children. In this context, this could only mean one thing - lavishly praising and encouraging children when they were caught in the act of showing good behavior. Children learned good behavior ultimately from the Christian example of parents. However, parents then backed up their example with lavish praise and encouragement, not harsh punishments or reprimands. This all worked to center the countenance of a child. Children also need religious instruction, as religion is a human need for children and adults alike. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to self-directed biblical instruction. This religious instruction started out with fathers leaving out a Bible for children to discover and explore. When children were caught in the act of studying the Bible, they were lavishly praised and encouraged with statements such as "that book is good for you". From there, children's religious instruction came in question and answer format. Children were eager to learn the facts of life, and fathers were quick to give pointers on the context. This religious instruction served to further the centering of the countenance of children. 

Mothers nurture from up close, and fathers nurture from afar. When children were under age 6, they were in constant closeness to mothers, meaning that wherever mom went, so did her child. Fathers kept their distance during the first 6 years because of a sexual attachment between father and child,  especially between father and daughter. Fathers were a secondary attachment to children then, with mothers being the primary attachment figure between parent and child. Fathers imprinted on their children through righteous masturbation, meaning they imprinted on their children through masturbating to sexual fantasies of their children. After the attraction was spent away through masturbation, fathers disciplined their children by way of praise and encouragement, forming a close bond along the way.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!