Original sin: How to raise your child in the doctrine of original sin (without punishment or force)

The doctrine of original sin is one of the most misunderstood and misused of Christian teachings. Yet, original sin is the backbone of Christianity. Without original sin, there would be no reason for a Christ. All children are born in original sin. However, calling them sinners and punishing them for it is a provocation to anger, and thus is abuse. How do we raise our children in the doctrine of original sin without punishing them or using force or shaming devices on them? There is a way, but it isn't punishment, that's for sure.

The Christian doctrine of original sin is taught using the Christian command of mutual submission. See Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long upon the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul as lifting up the customary law that commands a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to their children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his writings.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to here, in this context, modeling Christian discipline to children. The Christian standard of discipline is deserving of absolutely nothing, therefore grateful for absolutely everything, coming from a sinful nature, leading to a chastened up example for children to follow. Christian parents in the Early Church centered their entitlement in view of their children, with children following in their footsteps. Children in biblical times were caught being good, instead of being caught being bad. When children were caught emulating the disciplined example of parents - such as showing self-control or giving up something they really wanted - children were lavishly praised and encouraged to "keep going down the straight path". Boys were given manly praise from their fathers when caught being good, and girls were given physical affection from their fathers when caught being good. Sometimes, children needed direct parental instruction. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to direct parental instruction. Parents in biblical times were prohibited by Law from issuing lawfully binding orders to children, and thus instead pleaded with their children, asking favors of them from the bottom of their heart, expecting absolutely nothing in return.

All children, just like all human beings, are born in original sin. This is not up for debate. However, convicting your child of their original sin starts with YOU being convicted of your own original sin. Know that you are a depraved and decadent sinner who is deserving of absolutely nothing. This conviction and knowledge should lead to the parent being grateful for absolutely everything. Then, children will notice you doing hard work to improve yourself, and then they will want to improve themselves through taking an undeserving attitude towards life. When you see your child take an undeserving attitude towards life, praise them for it, and encourage them to keep going down the straight path.

What motivates a child to obey the undeserving example of their parents? A secure attachment, of course. For the first 6 years of a child's life, children were in constant closeness with mothers, meaning that wherever the mother went, so did the child. Mother and child were in a state of birth nudity, where mother and child were in the nude next to each other, in skin-on-skin closeness and intimacy. When children cried, mothers picked up their children, and then co-snuggled with them in skin-on-skin comfort and sustenance. When mothers were out and about, young children under age 6 were swaddled next to the bosom of mothers in swaddling blankets, perhaps breastfeeding the child if summoned to by the child, holding the child close when he/she cried. For the most part, the mother took charge in terms of parenting, and young children weren't allowed contact with their father, for reasons related to sexual abuse prevention. Having stable formative years of childhood allowed for fathers to encourage discipline and family values in children. Fathers in Ancient Jewish culture, contrary to popular belief, never sexually corrected their children - it was considered fornication - but instead used righteous masturbation to deal with the parent attraction. However the children got along with their mother is how they would get along with their father.

Children are born in sin, and that is a fact. However, what also is a fact is that children are capable of self-improvement. Children pretty much grow up and mature on their own. They just need a good Christian example to guide them into growing up and maturing in the right direction. Most childish and immature behavior in children is developmentally appropriate behavior, and just a phase. Children, however, are working on their behavior constantly, even if you don't see it, and they are working it to the ideal of your example

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them forever be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!