How to teach children Judeo-Christian values - without spanking or punishment

Many parents want to teach children Judeo-Christian values. This is a common desire amongst parents, and is a valid and honorable one. The problem is that most American parents who want to pass down Judeo-Christian values use punishments such as time-out and disciplinary spanking to "back up" a Christian example. Attachment parenting is often associated with humanistic values, but attachment parenting can be used to pass down any values system, including our nation's founding Judeo-Christian values.

The avoidance of entitlement is the core of our Judeo-Christian values. The Greek root word denoting entitlement in the New Testament, and cross-referencing the Tenth Commandment, is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, want, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, entitlement is the slightest of unattainable want. It is good not to want things in life, but since we all want things as depraved and decadent human beings, it is good to ask politely and appropriately. When you want something that will lead to a temper tantrum upon a "no" answer, don't want it, and avoid that want at all costs. Most entitlement comes from a deserving place in our sin nature, where you feel that you are deserving of things in life. Know that you are a depraved and decadent sinner who is deserving of absolutely nothing. This includes feeling entitled to things from your children. Children are watching your every move. Showing entitlement around or towards a child simply teaches them that it is okay to be entitled to get what they want. Do not show entitlement. Not even towards your own child.

Judeo-Christian non-entitlement is a good lesson to impart in example. However, every good example needs something to back it up. Punitive parenting simply leads to resentment, and drives children away from the Truth. Attachment parenting is the only way to impart good Judeo-Christian values onto children. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extension of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children just as they would to God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Parents are to submit to children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, fearing and revering children as vulnerable extensions of God. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up this legal context in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

America is a Christian nation, founded on Judeo-Christian family values. The way to teach these values is by imparting a good, non-entitled, and disciplined example to children. Then, if they have a secure attachment to you, they will follow in your footsteps, and want to be like you. You don't have to teach your children a darn thing if you have a secure attachment with them. All you have to do is have a shining example of Judeo-Christian values, being the salt and light of their world, and have a secure attachment with them to give them a safe place to absorb the Judeo-Christian values in their environment. 

Children won't become astute in the faith immediately, but in due time, they will absorb enough about Judeo-Christian values to have religious views of their own. It is recommended that you leave a Bible out for them to read, and once they start reading the Bible, lavishly praise and encourage their religious vocation. Children have the ability to form their own religious beliefs, seemingly out of nowhere. Usually, they contradict the beliefs of their parents at first, but then pan out to the beliefs of their parents by the time they are young adults. Be sure to set a good Judeo-Christian example to help children go the way they should go, and never alienate them with punishment or controlling demeanor. Declare yourself a depraved and decadent sinner who is deserving of absolutely nothing. When they see you take up this attitude, they will find that Truth in their Bible. Find fault in YOURSELF, not your child, and then they will find fault in themselves, not others. 

Children, in biblical times, wore absolutely no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude, in order to serve their husband and their children, separately. Mothers served their children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely attachment parenting items such as breastfeeding and skin-on-skin comfort. Children up until age 6 never left the side of mothers, ranging beside mothers when at home, clinging to her when crying or upset. Mothers held crying or upset children close to her bosom, in mammary closeness, while reassuring them "this too will pass". Mothers, when out and about, wrapped up their children in swaddling blankets, possibly offering children to suckle her teat if they were milk-hungry. By night, mothers co-slept next to their children, in order to form a secure attachment with them, and to protect them from predators, including the sexual entitlement of fathers. Fathers also formed a secure attachment with their children after witnessing skin-on-skin closeness between mothers and children, and wanting in by way of forming a sexual attachment to the child, and imprinting onto the child through masturbatory orgasm. This pro-social fantasy about the child on the part of fathers built a strong bond between father and child, where fathers served as playmate for the child, reeling themselves down to the level of the child. Fathers also encouraged children to engage in bold feats of independence, such as sleeping in their own bed or picking up a Bible to read.

There is no reason to sit down and instruct children in anything if you have a secure attachment with them. Children naturally grow towards the example of their parents, whatever that example is. Cultural norms are absorbed by children naturally by seeing parents engage in these norms and traditions. Children simply go through phases, and much childish behavior that most adults call "naughty" or "bad" actually is developmentally appropriate behavior. The idea is to let that behavior go, or else keep them safe if they are endangering themselves, and when they cry, reassure them, giving them skin-on-skin comfort if you are their mother. All children are built mentally the same way a baby is. When a baby cries, they are crying for something, and even if it is just attention, give it to them. ALL children are the same way.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!