Social media, cyberbullying, and the teen mental health crisis: Why social media isn't the problem

Many parents these days are hearing messages saying that their children shouldn't be on social media, because social media "encourages" cyberbullying. The mainstream media will have you believing that your child is feeling depressed and left out as they see their friends have fun on social media. Now, the Surgeon General is going along with this hysteria by calling for children under age 16 to stay off of social media, violating their free speech rights. The fact of the matter is that social media harbors cyberbullying, and cyberbullying comes from the parents modeling bully behavior by being bullies. It's the old "mean mom" trend, and its consequences on children. What is the solution? Christian attachment parenting is the answer to not raising a cyberbully.

Bullying comes from entitlement, and entitlement is modeled by parents. The Greek root word denoting entitlement in the New Testament, and cross-referencing the Tenth Commandment, is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and is defined as, officially speaking, want, to the point of imposition. Entitlement comes from a deserving attitude, where you think you deserve things in life. That deserving attitude can be imposed on children, in which case it is parental entitlement, and parental entitlement models the entitlement seen in bullies in the schoolyard, as well as online. The solution is to model non-entitlement by avoiding entitlement at all levels, including the parent level, meaning treating everyone in your life in a respectful, non-entitled way, including even your children.

Every good example needs something to back it up. What backs up this non-entitled example? Punitive parenting doesn't work, as it only drives children to be entitled by modeling entitlement to children, leading to raising a bully - including, perhaps, a cyberbully. Attachment parenting is the only way to back up a non-entitled example, and raise your child to be peaceable and respectful to others. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children as they would to God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Parents are to submit to children from beneath, yet from above, being convicted of being the enemy of children.

The Greek root world translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

Children, in biblical times, wore absolutely no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude, in order to serve both their husbands and their children. Mothers served their children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely attachment parenting items such as breastfeeding and skin-on-skin comfort. Children up until age 6 never left the side of their mothers, ranging beside her, clinging to her when they were crying or upset, with mother reassuring children with the phrase "this too will pass", with children clung to mothers in skin-on-skin format. When out and about, mothers wrapped up their children next to their bosom in swaddling blankets. By night, children co-slept next to mothers in skin-on-skin format, with mothers guarding children against predatory threats, including the sexual entitlement of fathers. Fathers also formed a secure attachment to children, when witnessing the skin-on-skin bonding between mother and child, then wanting in on the action through sexual attachment. Fathers in the Early Church dealt with this sexual attachment to their children by following their sexual thoughts about their child to the end using masturbatory fantasy. This lead to the father sexually imprinting on the child, thus leading to a close father-child relationship with the child imprinted on, with fathers being a human ragdoll for their children. Actual child sexual abuse in biblical times was rare next to non-existent, with adult fornicators of children being severely punished under the Law. Children were seen as extensions of God in biblical times, meaning the "least of these" called to judge and discern righteously between the sheep and the goats, bringing out the charity and good will in mankind.

Cyberbullying is a huge problem on platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok. Social media may create a new venue for cyberbullying, but social media does not cause cyberbullying. Bullies of all types had to learn that attitude from somewhere, and usually, they have parents that are bullies. But, we blame the child as a society, and think simply taking away computer privileges will get them to stop being bullies to other children on social media. No, YOU as the parent need to stop being a bully to your child, if you don't want your child to be a bully on social media. 

Attachment parenting conditions parents to be kind and courteous to their children, and from there, children learn how to be kind and courteous to others, including other children on social media. Kindness and courtesy are the opposite of entitlement. Punitive parenting instills a sense of entitlement in children, where might makes right, and thus it is okay to keep down the person smaller than you. Entitlement is the core of all of our problems, and I say this even as a children's rights advocate, and children are conditioned to embrace entitlement, including compress entitlement that keeps down people smaller than them. We want children to be kind, courteous, and not impose entitlement on others, so why are we being mean to them, and imposing entitlement on them?

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!