Pro-social skin-on-skin: The most time-honored parenting trick out there for a crying or tantrumming child

Many parents want a quick fix to raising children. Many pro-spanking advocates state that punitive tactics "work, and they work quickly", giving parents false hope of "immediate results". Many mainstream gentle parenting advocates say there is no quick fix in proper parenting. But, there is a quick way for a parent to gain cooperation - skin-on-skin comfort and sustenance. 

Attachment parenting is commanded in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV, in context:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, sacrificing for their children, just as Christ sacrificed for His children, being convicted of their depraved and entitled sin nature, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Attachment parenting was the established norm in Ancient Judeo-Christian culture. In Ancient Israel, attachment parenting was mandated under Jewish customary law. In the Early Church, attachment parenting was mandated under church ordinance. This Greek root word lifts up to all the attachment parenting context of the Bible, denoting a form of secure rest in parents leading to cooperation, and then compliance.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child, coming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all punitive parenting, including any punishment or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by bloodletting, after punishing their children enough times, and receiving enough warnings from extended family of their child victim(s). Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined as any damage or offense stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things they did wrong. Paul was lifting up this historical legal context to Greek Christians who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. No such custom existed among the Early Christians, as the Early Christians mandated attachment parenting as part of the church ordinance binding on all Christians in the 1st Century. Christian parents did not punish their children then, but instead used special skin-on-skin strategies to gain cooperation from children.

Mothers, in Ancient Judeo-Christian society, were primarily charged with the care and protection of children, and children were almost always supervised by a mother, and always were supervised by adults. Mothers in biblical times did not spank or punish to gain respect and cooperation, but instead used skin-on-skin strategies with children. Children did not wear clothing until they were adults, and mothers did not wear clothing inside the home. Mothers co-slept next to their children, and also co-snuggled with their children, in skin-on-skin format. The goal behind the skin-on-skin comfort was to form a secure parent-child bond where children cooperated with and respected parents, with any respect for parents being earned. All this according to the Hebraic context of the Bible.

Skin-on-skin comforting is the most time-honored way of dealing with a crying child. Throughout most of human history, children were co-mingled with their mothers, or else co-sleeping or co-snuggling next to her. Skin-on-skin comforting is usually when a mother place her children on her bosom, with the touch between the child's skin and the mother's skin lulling away any stress in the both of them. This is because skin-on-skin contact is ingrained in our evolutionary nature, with mothers naturally being wired to wear a child on their bosom. This according to parenting historians.

Any mother in particular who tries skin-on-skin comforting with their child to alleviate their stress and stress in the child will find that they immediately go into an attachment parenting mode, bonding securely with their child, alleviating their own stress alongside the stress of the child. This leads to calmer, more cooperative children, who almost never leave your side. Usually, a child who grows up in an attachment parenting home is shy and compliant, but wants to be that way at the lowest level. Instead of a fearful compliance that stirs resentment in children, they automatically comply and listen to parents, instinctively following the instructions of parents. If they don't know how to follow the instructions due to immature development, they hit a dead end, and in such cases the parent should pick up and do what the child was asked to do. Teenage rebellion in attachment parenting homes involves teens shaking off their parents and seeking to do things on their own, usually out of nowhere. 

In almost all cases, the way into attachment parenting is simply finding the courage to place a crying child on your bare bosom, allowing the child to undress as well (usually, children undress instinctively as well). If the child does not want to undress - at least not fully - the mere contact with exposed skin on the mother's bosom, even through clothing, will lead to reassurance for the child. The bosom is a part of a mother's anatomy designed and intended to comfort children. Older children can also be comforted this way, if they are placed head first on the bosom of mothers.

Fathers in biblical times did not directly care for children. Contact with fathers was only allowed at the child's consent, vetted by mothers. If a mother thought a father posed a threat to children, she could unilaterally protect the child from harm. Usually, this protective measure was brought out when a father presented a sexual threat to a child through a parent attraction. Fathers would nurture children from time to time, but in a more distant way, allowing for mothers to nurture children as she saw fit. Mothers were the primary caregivers of children, and most of the time, mothers were left with children while the father worked in the fields.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!