Instruction by example: How to impart Judeo-Christian values to children (without spanking or punishment)

Many parents in America want to impart Judeo-Christian values to their children. Most parents in the United States support Judeo-Christian family values. Most parents, however, think punishment is the only way to teach these good values. However, they can be taught by example, with that example backed up by attachment parenting. Attachment parenting is the time-honored way to teach Judeo-Christian values.

The Greek root word denoting entitlement in the New Testament, and cross-referencing the Tenth Commandment, is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers to, officially speaking, want, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, this word refers to the slightest of unattainable want. If what you want will lead to a temper tantrum upon hearing the word "no", don't want it, and fight against that want. Children can't help but throw temper tantrum, as children are immature and impulsive, and want what they want as part of their flawed nature as children. But, YOU can help your emotions and not throw temper tantrums around your children, including when your child throws a temper tantrum - parental entitlement tells adults to use force to shut down temper tantrums, when that in and of itself is an entitled temper tantrum.

On the other hand, discipline, in the Christian tense, is denoted by the Greek root word παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to a specific standard of Christian discipline, starting with an admission of a depraved and entitled sin nature, and ending up with an attitude that is entitled to nothing, and grateful for everything, leading to a chastened up example for children to follow. Children are not going to understand and internalize this example right away, as they are immature and impulsive. Children tend to engage in immature and childish behaviors, and these behaviors are the predestined fate of their nature, meaning they can be reduced to brainwaves that were intended by God to occur from the very beginning. Most childish behavior should be let go. Some, such as crying, should be responded to with empathy - never ignore a crying child, regardless of age. In those instances, YOU need to have the discipline to listen and validate instead of react with controlling anger and frustration. That means YOU need to have good discipline, and be chastened up by the Lord, in a way that is listening and validating to others in nature. 

A good example has to be backed up by something. Punitive parenting such as punishment and controlling demeanor only serves to drive away children from the example of parents. Attachment parenting makes children want to follow the good example of parents. The centerpiece of an attached Christian parenting home is Christian Agape love for children, as denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao), and refers to prioritizing children first, and yourself as the parent last, in a fearful and convicted way leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return from children or others, with children resting safely and securely in the good works of parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Parents are to be extensions of Christ, sacrificing for their children, just as Christ sacrificed for His children, with children resting in such sacrifice. Parents labor, toil, and work to win over the good graces of their children, just as they would for God, and children rest in such love and good works. Attachment parenting was the established norm in Ancient Jewish culture, including the Early Church. In Ancient Israel, attachment parenting was mandated under Jewish customary law. In the Early Church, attachment parenting was mandated under church ordinance. This Greek root word lifts up the attachment parenting context for the relevance of all.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely child abuse in this context. Child abuse, as defined under biblical law, at minimum, is the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child. The Apostle Paul gave this commandment to the Colossians from prison with the intent of issuing a prohibition on all punitive parenting, including punishment and controlling demeanor towards children. Punitive parents, in the Old Testament, were put to death for kidnapping when they punished their children enough times. Paul was lifting up this legal context when he rebuked fathers in the Colossian church for using force in the upbringing of their children. The teaching of "biblical spanking" does not come from the Bible, but from the Roman Catholic Church pandering to the punitive parenting biases of European pagan cultures who whipped and beat their children. The Ancient Jews, including the Early Christians, had no such custom.

The national parenting of the Ancient Jewish people, including the Early Christians, was a distinct, special form of attachment parenting that deified children, in the form of pro-social deification and pro-social child worship. Children were worshipped and venerated as extensions of God and His Authority on earth, with parents struck with reverent fear and terror for their child's every vulnerable want/need, being compelled in the Lord to surrender to and submit to children, with parents being their enemy, just as mankind the enemy of God and has to atone as such. The every vulnerable need of children was seen then as a lawful and binding summonses. Children could take their parents to court, and by that point, the verdict had already been decided - in favor of children.

How did this deified parenting pan out? Children went naked wherever they went. Women also went naked, within the family home, as a means to serve their husband and their children, separately. Mothers served their children by giving them nourishment and sustenance, namely breastmilk (until age 3) and skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy (especially during co-sleeping). By day, children ranged beside mothers, sometimes clinging to her. By night, children slept next to mothers, guarded from all threats external and domestic, with children soaking up the rays that is skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy. Fathers also nurtured, but from afar, usually by encouraging a child's religious education. Fathers spoke to children on formal terms, until children "broke the ice" and invited fathers to casual conversation with them. This limit was set because most adult men in Ancient Jewish culture were pedophiles towards their own children, but the abstinent type - child sexual abuse was seen as wicked and evil even then, with the act being seen as deserving of death. Both mothers and fathers took orders from children, and allowed children to be the boss of their own needs, meaning children bossed them around.

Attachment parenting serves to make children want to heed the example of parents. Giving children freedom, in the long run, leads to them following your example. Punishment and controlling demeanor only serves to alienate children from the message that is being modeled by their parents. Attachment parenting gives children a reason why they should follow the example of their parents - because parents gave them everything, and so children give back to their parents by respecting them and following their example.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!