Hebrews 12: Why this passage does not command spanking

Many parents misuse the Bible to justify their habits of child abuse, namely fundamentalist Christian parents, and one of the main verses used is Hebrews 12:5-11. One of my favorite, most comforting passages in the Bible, is Hebrews 12, but I know full well that it has nothing to do with parenting. I just know that when something upsetting or challenging comes my way, and it doesn't traumatize me, it is the chastening of the Lord, meaning the Lord is chastening me up like *only He can*. I can't chasten up a child like that, or else I'd seriously hurt the child. Only God can chasten up His children. Anything that is truly traumatic does not come from God, but from the Evil One.

It says in Hebtews 12:5-11 KJV:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation that speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him. For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chatening, God dealeth with you as sons: for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. Furthermore we have the fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not live under the subjection of the Father of spirits and live? For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but He for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. Now no chastening seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterwards it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.

This verse does not refer to corporal punishment, or any punishment of a child. The Greek root word translated "scourgeth" is μαστιγόω (Latin: mastigóo) and refers to the rod of correction in figurative terms, with literal language. The Apostle Paul, here, was writing to a distinctly Jewish audience, and the Ancient Jews used the rod of correction as a figure of speech for enduring hardship. Literally scourging a child was prohibited under Christian law back in the 1st Century, alongside all punishment and harsh treatment of children that provoked them to anger. This passage repeated uses the Greek root word παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to a specific standard of Christian discipline that admits its original sin, then takes up the attitude of being entitled to nothing, and grateful for everything. Taking this non-entitled attitude burns you up like a candlewick, so that nothing bothers you, and everything bounces off of you. Hurtful words just bounce off of you like a feather, and you just brush them off like dust. The more God throws at you, the more you can handle it.

Hebrews 12 does not really discuss parenting in detail, except for the fact that your children are chastening you up, and that chastening from your child's antics comes straight from God, with the child being His extension. Some verses in the New Testament actually do deal with parenting. It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the good works of parents, meaning parents are to be in dutiful and selfless submission to children, and children are to rest in the submission of parents, with this submission from parents coming from Christian love, as denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao). This verse was intended to lift up the customary law that mandated attachment parenting in the Early Church. This form of rest is where the child does not have a worry in the world, and parents instead worry about the child.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely child abuse in this context. Child abuse, as defined under biblical law, at minimum, is the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child, coming from entitlement. This commandment, when understood in its original linguistic and legal context, is a prohibition against all punitive parenting, including any punishment or controlling demeanor towards children. The Apostle Paul was lifting up the Law to a few Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking children into the church. Spanking does not come from the Bible, but from a pagan ritual that the Greeks and the Romans did on their children, in order to purify them of their uncleanliness, in which case "uncleanliness" meant every little childhood behavior.

Hebrews 12 is one of my favorite Bible passages. It comforts me to know that the harshness of life is something God is using towards me to make me better - like only He can do! Nothing in my life currently is traumatic, but a lot concerning a gaslighting tape - intended as an investigation - is draining, but God allowed that to happen so that I could be chastened up and stronger as a person. Usually, I resent it on the inside, but take the crap thrown at me on the outside. 

The fact that I like it so much tells me that punishment is not commanded in Hebrews 12 - the chastening of the Lord is something God does Himself to His children every now and then (or maybe every day for some of us), not something a human parent does to their child. Human parents are flawed to the point of depravity, and so if we as adults start chastening up children like God does, we run the risk of harming them for life. Children need to learn how to chasten up themselves, and be encouraged by a loving father who takes pleasure in a child's growth, just as it was done in biblical times.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!