Forgiveness of parents: Why you don't have to forgive your abusive parents

Many parents think that their children have to forgive them. This is a common belief among parents. Parental rights groups spread the false message that parents should be forgiven. Forgiveness is not an emotional matter in the Christian faith, but is a matter of law. With independent adult children, guilt can be mutual between parent and child, meaning just as a parent can sue their child at court, so can a child sue their parents at court.

Christ said on the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 6:14-15 KJV:

For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if you forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

The Greek root word translated "trespasses" is παραπτομα (Latin: paraptoma) and refers to legal trespasses committed from neighbor to neighbor. This meant mainly civil wrongs, but also every criminal act under Christian law except fornication. In context, this referred to forgiveness based on the apology of the offender, and the genuineness of said apology.

There are two main types of forgiveness

1. Acquittal (charges erased)
2. Exoneration (charges deemed false based on evidence)

An acquittal usually happens before the trial, and is simply letting go of a personal offense, meaning there was an offense committed, but it wasn't recorded by the judgment of the Christian. Exoneration happens after the trial, when you have the wrong person or else mistakenly judged someone in some other way. An acquittal can be reversed in court with repeated infractions. An exoneration can be reversed with new evidence, in which case the exoneration never existed to begin with. An acquittal can also occur with a sincere apology to the victim that was harmed by the offense. Forgiveness is mandatory if the plaintiff perceives the offender as genuine in his/her apology. All forgiveness means is the statement "I acknowledge your apology" meaning a record of the offender saying sorry. You don't have to trust an offender right away, and if you are wrong in your acquittal, and they re-offend, cast them back.

Forgiveness is the opposite of non-existence by way of biblical standards. Proper non-existence is when the offender has egressed at the orders of the plaintiff, and is obligated to be quiet to the victim they wronged to the point of perceptual non-existence. Forgiveness is appearing to the victim again, and making amends. It is an uphill curve for the offender, not the plaintiff, meaning the plaintiff can simply choose not to forgive if the offender appears ingenuine in some way, by the victim's perception. An offense perceived, when coming from entitlement, is like a restraining order, meaning the Bible allows for the victim/plaintiff to send away their abuser, and harass the abuser in a pro-social manner until the abuser does not exist, and the victim does not perceive the abuser. Forgiveness is not for everyone. Christ never said that. Christ simply said to forgive your enemies when they turn themselves into you, and mean what they say when they are apologetic.

Minor children could not be charged with any moral legal offense by a parent, and nor could dependent adult children. But, among independent adult children, judgment was mutual, meaning just as parents could judge their children, children could judge their parents. Abused children who judged their parents were seen as discouraged children, and such was a shame on the parents for their own actions. 

Let the depraved and entitled parents BURN in everlasting Hell-fire! Repent!