Why attachment parenting is a Christian tradition

Many parents think punitive parenting that involves punishment is what is held as Christian tradition. America is a Christian nation, founded on Judeo-Christian family values, with attachment parenting being part of our traditions as a country. Attachment parenting is in the Bible, and is the true context of biblical law. Attachment parenting is a tenet of our natural law as a country.

Attachment parenting is driven by Christian love, or putting children first, and parents last, in a convicted way that leads to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing from children or others, with children resting safely and securely in parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. This form of respect does not come from fearful compliance, but surrender into the loving arms of parents, with children telling parents anything and everything that is on their mind, including acts of wrongdoing, expecting absolutely no punishment or reprisal in return for disclosing information to parents. Parents, in the biblical sense, are bondservants beholden to children and their every vulnerable need, with parents submitting from above, and children resting from beneath. Attachment parenting was the norm in Ancient Israel and the Early Church. Think a Christian mother holding pales of water, with a young child wrapped up next to her bosom in swaddling blankets, and an older child strapped to her back in a papoose bag. Boil over, then safe. That was the heyday of attachment parenting. The goal of parenting in biblical times was a secure parent-child bond, in all matters of parenting.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely child abuse in this context. This refers to the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child, coming from entitlement. In this commandment, the Apostle Paul is lifting up the Law on the punishment and controlling demeanor towards children. Punitive parenting does not come from the Bible, but from Ancient Greco-Roman society, meaning even then, Christians were misusing the book of Proverbs to justify whipping children, and this is what Paul was warning against. The verses in Proverbs regarding the rod do not refer to "biblical spanking" but a specific, archaic form of judicial corporal punishment closely conflated with the death penalty in the Old Testament - the 40 minus 1 lashes with the rod of correction, as a final warning before an ADULT child was put to death, administered to the bare back (NEVER the buttocks) in a courtroom (NEVER a family home) after a criminal conviction before a court of law. MINOR children could not be whipped legally, as they could not be charged with a crime, with minor age being a defense.

Mothers and fathers had different roles regarding attachment parenting in Ancient Israel and the Early Church. Mothers took the role of providing nourishment and sustenance to children, namely breastmilk and skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy respectively. Children in biblical times went naked wherever they went, and mothers were also naked traditionally in the family home. Mothers and children snuggled in the nude, with the nudity of the children lowering the level of attachment to full equality, with parents "growing up with" their children. Relationships with fathers were more casual, in an encouraging way, meaning fathers and children hung out as friends, with a connotational parent attraction being part of the dynamic, in the form of "sun tan oil". The ancients had a concept of child sexual abuse, and it was seen as wicked and evil to sexually use or objectify a child. Fathers instead put children, especially older daughters, on a pedestal, idealizing them in a deified way, seeing them as little gods and goddesses to appease. Fathers acted as a human ragdoll around children, and encouraged them in their religious vocation, which was chosen by the child him or herself...Some of this context might be dated, but much of it is applicable today, perhaps with some tweaking.

Religious instruction was mandatory only for young boys in the New Testament, but girls were often interested as well. Children would spend hours reading Scripture, forming their own personal theology apart from their parents. Fathers and children often met to discuss Scripture, with fathers giving tips on proper ways to interpret Scripture, discussing the issue, as well as other academic matters, casually, in a homeschooling setting similar to the attachment parenting concept of unschooling. Children read Scripture on their terms, not that of their parents.

Attachment parenting is a Christian tradition in this country. We are learning a lot about our values as a country as of late, including more people with those values. We learned that slavery and Jim Crow were wrong to do to people of color, and so we broke down the barriers and included them. Attachment parenting (AP) includes children in society when widely practiced by a society, instead of shutting them out.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!