"Honor parents": Understanding the Fifth Commandment in context

Many parents want to be honored, and demand being honored from children. The Fifth Commandment has long been the first and foremost excuse for child abuse by American parents. However, honoring parents means something different than not "talking back".

It says in Exodus 20:12 KJV:

Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

This commandment here does not refer merely to "back talk" but to elder abuse. Elder abuse is not simply having a shouting fit with a parent, but literally beating them, bludgeoning them, and taking advantage of them. The parent protection laws in the Old Testament were handed down by God to that specific society because in ancient Israel, elder abuse was rampant, with children sending their parents on their merry way by way of gaslighting influence, just to get what they wanted. Striking a parent was a crime then because adult children commonly struck parents, and only ADULT children were subject to the Law. Minor children could not be charged with dishonoring parents. Merely talking back to your parents or even giving them the cold shoulder will not land a child in Hell. Elder abuse victims were blamed by society at large for bringing on their own abuse, by way of punishing their child. The attitude was that if your child beat you, you must have modeled that behavior somewhere. Hence, why the parent protection laws were passed, and are only relevant for THAT time period - child abuse is more rampant in our society today.

Every single parent and adult is guilty in relation to children, with me being guilty as well, deserving of DEATH and DESTRUCTION merely for existing in relation to children, being meek and shamefaced in relation to children, speaking to children only at their cue and consent, being shut up in the Lord, with the child as His extension. Parents especially are to esteem their children above all else, putting children first, and parents last, leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every need, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents, with parents being attendant caregivers of children, owing absolutely nothing in return for the unquestioning sustenance and nourishment from parents and adults in general. Attachment parenting was the norm in both ancient Israel and the Early Church, and an established norm at that. Think a mother holding pales of water, with a young child being wrapped up next to her bosom in swaddling blankets, with an older child in the nude in tow next to her mother, with the mother gathering water for cooking food and to drink. 

The Greek root word translated "parents" is γονεύς (Latin: goneus) and refers not to a role of authority over children, but being a caregiver of a child, with the child being in the role of ward. Parents are to wait over their children head and foot, like attendant waitstaff in a restaurant, not questioning the orders of their children. Simply "yes, my dear" unless it is completely unattainable or unsafe.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including the slightest of offensive touch or words perceived by the child. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul to lift up the Law to the Colossian church on the custom of many Greek Christians there to punish their errant children. Punishing children, under both Jewish and Christian law, carried severe legal penalties, with punitive parents being excommunicated from the Christian churches of God. Any entitlement in relation to children was seen as worthy of judgment, meaning any want to or of a child to the point of imposition (1 Cor. 5:11). The rod verses in both Proverbs and Hebrews do not refer to spanking, but a specific, dated, and rarely administered legal punishment - the 40 minus 1 lashes with the rod of correction, after a criminal conviction of a capital offense, as a last warning perhaps saving an offender from death. Only ADULT children were punished, and rarely for a crime against a parent (most parents instead deemed their child a prodigal son). Minor children could not stand trial in court for any criminal act or civil wrong. The rod verses in Hebrews 12:5-11 do not refer to a literal rod, but a figurative rod, which was symbolic in ancient Jewish culture for enduring hardship, meaning a figure of speech.

Honoring parents means resting in their love and care as a young child and as an older child. It does not mean a young child has to listen to or blindly obey their parents, nor is blind compliance even possible with younger children in particular. Children simply rest, meaning they owe nothing in relation to parents, and simply are to receive sustenance, nourishment, and also guidance from parents. Children are to be allowed to develop as is, with minimal adult interference.

What did this rest look like? Rest meant in biblical times a young child being wrapped up next to mothers in swaddling blankets until age 6, and older children playing freely in the supervision of parents. Children were allowed to play high-risk games many times, with many of these games carrying sexual undertones, as biblical parents did not shield their children from sexual realities. The most high-risk games played was "marriage" - Christian marriage in the Bible requires consummation to be valid, whereas most children embraced. However, Hebrew and Christian parents supervised play constantly lest a child penetrate another, which could cause them their life later in the Old Testament context. Children in biblical times went naked everywhere they went, with clothing being seen as an adult luxury. Apart from preventing children from penetrating each other sexually, the only stipulation on play was that either mother or father supervise. Rest in parents is either one of freedom or one of closeness, and even older children alternated between playing outside and clinging next to mothers closely. Fathers related to their children at an equal level, usually due to parental sexual attachment that colored older children in particular as sexually attractive - mothers stood guard over their daughters in relation to their father and other men.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death, which is Satan's final resting place! Let them descend into the abyss which is everlasting Hell and torment! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!