Sunday, October 17, 2021

Children first, parents last: God's order in parenting

Many parents believe their needs come first, because "you wouldn't be here if it wasn't for me". We live in a parents-first society. However, the old adage of Christian parenting, however, is simple to understand, yet hard to swallow if you are a parent - children first, parents last.

The doctrine of mutual submission is the Christian doctrine for parenting. It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: as is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest and trust in the love and grace of parents, coming from sacrifice for one's child, in the spirit that Christ sacrificed for His children; taking up the cross for one's child, in the spirit that Christ took up the cross for His children; martyring oneself for one's child in everything regarding parenting, with children resting securely in the sacrifice of parents, showing their gratitude and thanksgiving by emulating the sacrificial nature of parents. This Greek root word here ultimately uplifts the Judeo-Christian parenting traditions, which are attachment-based in nature. Children in biblical times went in the nude, meaning child nudity was legal and acceptable, and was so in order for mothers to treat their young children with skin-to-skin contact and breastfeeding. Children up to age 3 were treated behaviorally as infants, and breastfed as such. Children co-slept next to their mothers at night right up until adulthood, with mothers and daughters being inseparable for protective reasons (Lev. 18:17). Parents were safe people to play freely in the presence of, and unleash emotion onto, with parents being selfless ragdolls and punching bags for their child's emotions and upset, taking glee in their sacrifice. Parents in biblical times were convicted by their child's every demand, struck with reverent terror and fear, leading to surrender to the child's demands, with children not mincing their words in their orders towards parents, and parents being attendant to the child's every lawful order as to their needs, with children being a vulnerable yet convicting extension of God (Matt. 25:31-46).

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and literally translates to "stirring up" upset and resentment in children, referencing the Jewish adage of "stirring the pot" in terms of your child's emotional well-being. This was a direct command from God through the Apostle Paul prohibiting all corporal punishment of children, as well as all punishment or harsh treatment, with the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child being a form of child abuse, thus a moral offense. The Greco-Roman parenting norms then were very much in favor of corporal punishment, but Paul would have none of it in the churches that he oversaw. The offense in question is provocation to anger, which is a form of theft, or when done to a vulnerable victim such as a child, kidnapping. Paul handed out parenting manuals that directed parents towards the attachment parenting route, with that form of attachment parenting being based on a Christ-like example of selfless discipline, and forming the proper bond with a child so that your example is taken seriously. Parents were allowed to give warnings to their children, of the gentle, non-binding type, such as "be careful not to break the vase" while allowing them to run around and play in the house. 

Children come first, then parents last. That's because children issue demands, and parents supply. That is God's order, fair and square, and will be until the end of time, even as our current society turns their backs on God in this way, God's order in parenting stands. Children first, parents last.

The depraved and entitled parents who are punitive and/or permissive will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn and rot in the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death, which is Satan's final resting place! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand! 

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