Strictness: Why parents need to be strict with themselves (and spare children)

American parenting values strictness, and gentle parents of the progressive sort abhor even the mention of strictness. I might be permissive in another realm, so I get it. However, conservatism is about strictness and discipline, but in terms of self-control for adults. Most conservatives simply assume children cannot control themselves, and need to be control through some external force. The truth is that children can control themselves.

God's order of the family is stated in Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, as this is right. Honor thy father and mother, as this is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live upon the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the care, support, and protection of parents, with children being able to tell parents anything, or confide anything into parents, with children feeling safe to be themselves in relation to parents, owing nothing to parents, yet listening to parents nonetheless, feeling safe and secure in terms of attachment enough to listen to parental instruction.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to non-entitled discipline, self-control, and centering of parental control drives in relation to children, both physical and sexual. This sort of self-control in a parent is one to encourage pro-social rebellion, meaning parents allow for their children to challenge them, even harshly and perhaps aggressively as a pro-social punching bag, but saying "not everyone is going to understand, but I'm here to listen". This is called co-regulation, meaning the child centers themselves by being listened to and validated by a centered, disciplined parent. This is known as the chastening of the Lord, meaning God's Loving Instruction, usually by example but also by pamphlet. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to God's Loving Reproof, meaning the word "no" or its various variants, meaning setting limits and boundaries with a child without threat of punishment or control. The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργιζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to the offenses in the Bible, meaning the torts and damages  such as assault and battery against a child, and is summed up after Christ as the slightest of personal slights perceived by a child, by way of controlling, demanding, or punitive behavior.

Attachment parenting was the norm in ancient Jewish culture, with children co-sleeping next to mothers, and being held on the back of their mothers, with closeness to parents lasting until a late age. Punishment was illegal for a child under any circumstance, and only legal as a sentence for crime for a legal adult. Children were allowed to rebel in relation to parents, meaning cry, scream, pout, and all of the behaviors children use to get their needs by going against the grain of their parents' instruction, in righteous mode. Generally, children have needs when they have big feelings like that  They may just want attention, so give it to them. This is something the parents in the Bible understood.

The idea is for parents to be strict with themselves, and then model such behavior by example to their children. This may come with some encouragement from parents, and then you can expect children, as they get older, to be strict with themselves on their own. This means be disciplined yourself, allow your child to come to you about anything that is on their mind, and this should cushion them to be self-disciplined and controlled themselves, on a traditional basis.

The depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them burn! Let them suffer the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!