Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this right. Honor thy father and mother, as this is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live upon the earth.
The Greek root word translated "obey" sheds light on the entire meaning of this passage, and is denoted by the Greek root word υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in relation to parents, being able to tell parents anything without fear of punishment, owing nothing to parents in return.
This is a commandment for parents to take note of, not so much children, as respect is earned from children, and adults must shut up, and chasten up themselves in relation to a child. What is being referred to here is secure attachment to children, meaning a form of closeness prompted by parents eliminating ways for children to be afraid of them, leading to trust and cooperation from children.
Children do not have to love their parents, as true Christian love for a child is an action, and one of service to the child. Children are simply to rest in the shelter and grace of parents, having no worries about anything, with the parents worrying about everything, and the child simply is allowed to be a child, as they define it. Children should trust their parents, and this trust should appear, especially for very young children, as closeness, particularly to mothers, but also to fathers in a more distant way.
Corporal punishment and any other form of punishment or harsh treatment was against church ordinances in the 1st Century. It says in Colossians 3:21 KJV:
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.
The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and literally translates to "stir up" and one of the Greek words that point to the offenses in the context, meaning torts and damages, which included assault and battery in the Old Testament, and is summed up in the New Testament as the slightest of personal slights perceived by the child, stemming from willful or negligent entitlement. Any sort of control or demanding behavior and attitudes from adults, including any sexually entitled behavior or attitudes, that lead to the child feeling offended or upset, is abuse.
Children have a right to stand up to parents, and even offer parenting advice. This ensures that they will comply and be cooperative when there is an exigent need for said cooperation. Children listen to parents that listen to them. True surrender to parents is like a mirror, meaning the parent's calm, centered attitudes reflect in the child's attitudes, as is the parents kindness and compassion likewise.
The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God, and will be tormented in eternal Hell-fire! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!
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