The purpose of VirPed - Why we needed that advance in scientific knowledge

 Does the whole world hate pedophiles? The majority of pedophiles have not told their parents about it, and were abused indirectly or directly ("I can just tell..." behind the child's back). My mother is the most understanding person on this issue, judged by how much she knows and how much she can know if she simply asks - everything under the sun! I would actually go to her for issues such as pornography addiction, perhaps, and she'd monitor the computer, at the cue of my submission to parents. Most pedophiles don't have this, and so they'd think the whole world was out to get them. I try to avoid "me vs. big bad world" statements regarding my self-interest, and save that for other people. Things are getting better thanks to Virtuous Pedophiles forum.

The Virtuous Pedophiles forum was founded in 2012. Before then, there was limited knowledge of non-offending pedophiles. The anti-contact movement, which is the political roots of VirPed, beforehand, was an underground movement, only existing in "foursquare" organizations of "decomposition", meaning chipping away at the type of guilty conscience towards children common of pedophiles. Most of these pedophiles were non-offending, but the movement was distrusted and then branded criminal due to its leadership, a peacekeeping narcissist who was known as "Ganmamiel" who spoke in 10,000s referring to "sharks". The general opinion among Americans was that a pedophile was helpless to their urges, and needed to be coddled in a way that was punitive, and "reminded them of what they were capable of" by example and not lecture, thinking "the pedophile wants a dance".

These days, the anti-pedophile traditions are now quietly in question by a large part of the population, who bury their support for non-offending pedophiles at the very back of their minds, due to political correctness. Most progressive individuals, as well as many libertarian conservatives, want to get involved, but find that they have a job, they have a home, and they could lose all of it just for defending a victim of abuse. I actually have little prospect of holding a job that pays, at this point, due to the severity of my autism (I often think these sorts of issues occur behind the scenes at VirPed).

Trauma survivors have complex views on the existence of VirPed, but most are in favor of the group itself, with the "VirPed trauma" camp dying out. They don't like that any pedophile exists anywhere, but quietly support a pedophile in going to a talk forum to discuss their issues freely. The official stance of the community is that we can't help VirPed as a whole, due to the severity of their oppression. Some members are hostile to VirPed, and harass me sometimes about a fake "VirPed trauma" of mine. Theirs is real, and VirPed regrets inflicting it, and they show it by trying to stay away - they were afraid of this movement hurting me, and any pedophile group that sticks up for one of its members to that degree is not a pro-abuse group, and most survivors would concur with me on that.

My support for VP goes further - it is about time that possibility, that very believable possibility by any reasonable mind, be known to the general population. I trust VirPed as a smokestack agency to inform the public, under the grid, of the fact that most pedophiles do not abuse children, and that pedophilia is a medical condition lumped in with criminality but is a victim/abuser that mimics an abuser.

My approach to broaching this topic is assuming that my audience doesn't know what a pedophile is, even if they think they know what I am talking about. A productive conversation is like a dance, but a productive one where you point out you are speaking of "clinical pedophiles". Most survivors sort pedophiles into the clinical and criminal categories. Criminal "pedophiles" are these big, tough, policing narcissists. A clinical pedophile can be a clinical narcissist as well, but are more likely to be ultimate victims like me, of the pessimistic/fatalistic and/or angry type...Most people do not know what a pedophile is, namely less educated members of society, and lump the two categories together. So, I point out the classifications, and then tell them which classification I really care about - clinical pedophiles. Those are the only people who deserve the label "pedophile". Call the others what they are, and quit coddling them. They're called abusers, and they are the type to pick on vulnerable clinical pedophiles, usually taking advantage of autism in them as well...I actually have experienced that type of grooming, and I am very lucky to have a mother to vent to about it. Other pedophiles should have what I have.

What do we want? What I have. People to talk to about our issues. That's about it, and the rest of what VirPed asks may never happen, such as lolicon being legalized, but oh well. That's the only kind of openness I as an advocate want on this issue - open access to treatment and therapy, which is currently kept down due to mandated reporter laws that are more lenient here in Pennsylvania - only after a confession. In most states, the law is vague and needs to be clarified. We have a whole list of professions, as the law here on mandated reporting is very specific. I do not think a therapist, who has the skill many times to remedy the situation themselves, should jump to reporting. Most professionals are very able to treat pedophiles if they trusted their intuition, but false religious taboos drive them off course, with much of the population falsely considering it a spiritual condition, when it is actually a mental health condition worthy of treatment by a mental health professional. Even with active incest situations, much like a physical abuse situation, a therapist can stop everything if the parent is motivated, which I think happens under the surface - it is never found out, ever. A therapist could stop me from sexually abusing a child by simply warning a spouse of mine, and forming an agreement to avoid the child at certain places and at certain times. I support CPS doing this as well. 

An entitled adult, meaning one that defends their "rights", however, should be in prison for life, without protective custody. Who cares about their human rights when they don't care about those of the child. That child that they are molesting might just be a pedophile as well. I wasn't molested, but was punished physically, and the medical fact that I am a pedophile means that my trauma is all over me, meaning I can throw it on YOU if you disclose a parent to me, and defend child abuse. My attitude towards pedophilia awareness is victims first, abusers last. One can be marked as an offender, and not currently abusing any child, and if you regret what you did, so be it, as long as you are taking the steps to repair your life, since the child's life cannot be repaired. Most pedophiles don't do those things. We tend to be incredulous victims of abuse, and incredulous due to how our victim is formed and what is conflated with it.

VirPed is a good group. The feel, being there, is kind of quiet most of the time. It is a safe place to disclose especially sexual trauma, and have no judgment. But, linking that or any trauma to children's rights offends some moderators, if they don't know what you mean by "children's rights". My idea of children's is about normalizing the word "child" as a way to get out of trouble, and assert your rights. Many countries are far more advanced than us on children's issues. All it is, from the adult's perspective, is surrendering your authority in front of children, and then being their bigger, more responsible friend. Isn't that what pedophiles want? As long as the child feels comfortable, and doesn't reciprocate, I don't see why not. If the friendship is used to impose entitlement, and abuse the child, the whole friendship is marred, and becomes a form of abuse called spousification. Spousification is if you literally think a little girl is your girlfriend, or else is "coming on" to you. If you just see connotations, and then reality, you are not entitled, and being friends with a child is okay. Preferably, though, you should start with your own, and expand from there. I think a pedophile is perfectly capable.