Many people think the Bible commands for children to respect their parents. I respect my parents, but that is because they earned it. The Bible says both for children to honor parents, and for parents to give their children a reason to love and respect them.
Parenting in ancient Jewish culture was attachment-based, with parents erring on the side of permissiveness. Parents themselves were afraid of their rowdy children being executed. Under the Mosaic Law, the authorities were for hire, meaning if you didn't hire the religious authorities, anything went. There was a certain stigma to calling the authorities - you were the abuser, not the child.
The parent protection laws include capital statutes for striking a parent, casting a gaslighting spell onto a parent, and being a stubborn and rebellious son. The statute calling for the stoning of a stubborn and rebellious son is depicted in Deuteronomy 21:18-21 KJV:
If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and that, they have chastened him, will not hearken unto them: Then shall his father nor his mother lay hold onto him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city, and unto the gate of his place; And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This out son is stubborn and rebellious; he is a glutton and a drunkard. And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, so that he may die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you, and all Israel shall hear, and fear.
This refers to a specific procedure, meaning ALL of the criteria would have to be proven, "stubborn", "rebellion", "glutton", "drunkard". "Glutton", in the contextual understanding of the Bible, refers to a specific individual who eats forbidden meats,. as stated in Leviticus 11, meaning the offense isn't applicable as a moral legal charge in today's world. ALL of these charges would have had to been proven, in a row, with eyewitness accounts, with the errant son presumed innocent beyond a reasonable doubt. The son had to legally be an adult, meaning a young man who was read on the law, and it was proven that he knew what he was doing, and didn't care...No son was ever executed, because the parents would be too embarrassed to get the authorities involved. Dishonoring parents meant accusing them of the same abuse you mete out towards others, pointing them out as an example through your own actions.
The parent protection laws are repealed in the New Testament in Colossians 3:21 KJV:
Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they become discouraged.
The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to momentary damages to a child, such as pain, shame, emotional distress, defamation of character, and fornication. This command was written to fathers of Greco-Roman heritage who were prone to using physical punishment on their children. Jewish law forbade that, and saw striking anyone outside of a courtroom as unclean, and possibly a legal damage when perceived by the child. The Greek root word translated "they become discouraged" is αθυμέω (Latin: athumeo) and refers to long-term damages, such as childhood trauma and PTSD. What Paul was ultimately warning fathers at the Church at Colossae is that a child mirrors your attitudes toward you, right back at you. When you are harsh and controlling, the child tries to control back, and then it becomes a power struggle.
Parenting in ancient Jewish culture was attachment-based, and the every demand of children in the 1st Century Christian churches, as children were seen as extensions of Christ, meaning the "least of these" - treat them with disrespect, and you treat God with disrespect, thus committing blasphemy as well, known as pro-social child worship. Children ranged by their mothers, and oftentimes were tethered to their mother towards a late age, as a 2-3 year old was still seen as an infant. Boys still remained close to their mother until age 6, when they went with their father (think non-eventful handover of legal custody). Girls stayed until age 12, when they went with their father to be offered for marriage, meaning young men would come over, court her, and her father found the right one for her. The daughter had a say on the contract, and the father and daughter collaborated, with the father's leadership and guidance...The strict parenting you hear ascribed to the Bible is not biblical at all. It is blasphemy of God's Word and Law, as well as blasphemy of God Himself.
It is acceptable for me to use force to assert myself with a parent, but only within the law of the land (Rom. 13:1-4). We are talking pro-social verbal abuse, meaning berating a parent to get their attention, and not to intentionally hurt or undermine them. They may not be listening to your needs, at least in the moment, and you need to get an important point across, and so you raise your voice in a way that chastens them up to your needs, thus melds them down. The 2-year-old version of this is a temper tantrum in the store. You should ALWAYS feel comfortable with your emotions, even to that degree, with a parent, or else that says something about the parent - that you fear punishment from them...Gentle, non-violent parenting often does not have a quiet ambiance. There usually is a domiciliary peacekeeper, known as pro-social pedophilia, where much of the child energy is siphoned into a home, and otherwise the child is calm, quiet, but safe with parents in terms of perceptions, perhaps staying close and/or being held.
The depraved, entitled parents who provoke their children to anger though punitive or permissive means will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Being the parent and abusing a child physically and lawfully will never be acceptable to God, even if it is widely accepted. Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!
No comments:
Post a Comment
Any comment that
1. Endorses child abuse (including pornography of such)
2. Imposes want to the point of imposition, meaning entitlement.
3. Contains self-entitled parent rhetoric, to the point of self-victimization
will not be published. Flexible application. Debate is allowed, but only civil arguments that presume the best of intentions in their opponent, on both sides.