Children, obey your parents in all things: as this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This highlighted word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to perform good works for their children, with children resting safely and securely in the good works of parents. Good works is defined here as doing good things for children, meeting the child's every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.
The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children their children were initially charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as deacon.
Respect for parents was a thing in biblical times. However, this respect came in the form of closeness to parents, as opposed to fear of parents. For the first 6 years of childhood, children were in constant closeness to mothers, meaning that wherever mom went, so did her child. For the first 2 years of childhood, children were constantly held, either in mom's loving arms, or else on her back in a papoose bag when mom's hands were full. Between ages 2-6, children were attached at the hip of mothers, ranging next to her, crying a deathly and screeching cry when mom left the room, morbidly fearing that mom would "go away and never come back". Whenever a child cried, Christian mothers cooed at children before picking them up, and from there, she diagnosed the need before meeting that need. Maybe the child was tired. Maybe the child was hungry. Maybe the child needed mom's milk. Maybe the child needed mom, period. Whatever the child needed, they got it. When children and mothers under age 6 were out and about, mom wrapped up their children next to her bosom in swaddling blankets, with the swaddling blankets - and the child with them - being tucked underneath the loose-fitting, revealing dress worn by mothers that resembled an apron. Come nightfall, children co-slept next to mothers in skin-on-skin sustaining warmth. Children went naked wherever they went, with mothers also going naked within the confines of the family home. This birth nudity setup helped facilitate easy skin-on-skin closeness, with children experiencing the rays of skin-on-skin contact merely when simply picked up.
Children in biblical times were respectful towards their parents. This respect came in the form of playful affection on the part of children. Most children were cooperative in the form of following mom around, in a peaceable and orderly fashion, like goslings to a mother goose. Most children obeyed their parents not out of fear of punishment, but due to strong trust in parents. Children were especially easygoing after age 6, when they played freely in the form of wet and messy play - but they sure cooperated with parents otherwise, giving back in the form of things such as willingly doing chores without even being prompted to do chores, just to please mom and dad. Teenagers in attachment parenting homes even find a place of employment, usually flipping burgers or bussing tables.
Parents are non-deserving of anything coming from a child. Not even respect. Not even forgiveness. Not even affection. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Respect in parenting does not come for free on a silver platter. Respect is not a right for parents, with the burden of proof in a mutual submission relationship falling squarely onto parents. If you loved your children the right way, meaning the gentle parenting way, you should find that your children are willing to care for you as you age.
The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss, which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!
No comments:
Post a Comment
Any comment that
1. Endorses child abuse (including pornography of such)
2. Imposes want to the point of imposition, meaning entitlement.
3. Contains self-entitled parent rhetoric, to the point of self-victimization
will not be published. Flexible application. Debate is allowed, but only civil arguments that presume the best of intentions in their opponent, on both sides.