Crying: Why children crying is not bad behavior (and instead is communication)

Many parents think that crying is some scheme to "undermine" the "authority" of parent. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Crying is the number one reason for punishing a child. However, the fact of the matter is that crying always happens for a reason. Most of the time, the child needs YOU.

Tending to the cries of a child is a part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission, with the burden of proof falling squarely onto parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers here to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This highlighted word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to serve children selflessly, just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθίζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor toward children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon. 

Most parents punish their children when the child even starts crying. However, the fact of the matter is that children cry in order to communicate. Whenever children cried out for mom, she was always there to respond.  Mothers tended to their children by way of first cooing at children, and then picking up the child from there. From there, children growing up in the Early Church had their every need tended to. 

Cooing is a primal vocalization on the part of mothers, designed by God to put children at ease. From there, children growing up in the Early Church were put at ease, with speaking children then verbalizing what they need. Children were then given all of what they need, and most all of what they want.

Crying is a means that children use to communicate with parents. Whenever a child breaks down crying, they need tender loving care from mom. There are five main categories of need; food, water, shelter, transportation, and attachment - with the greatest of these being attachment. The tired cry was always met with closeness from mom, and thus tiredness was deemed an attachment need in and of itself.

Most childhood behaviors are due to normal stages in child development. It is normal for children under age 6 to cry especially when they fear abandonment. Older children whine or roll their eyes when they don't feel listened to. All a parent has to do is give up the fight, and give in to the demands of children. Once you give into your child's demands, the rest should be a piece of cake.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!