Hebrews 12:5-8: Why this passage is not a pro-spanking passage

Many parents misuse the Bible in order to justify their choice to punish or reprimand a child. The pro-spanking arguments center around a few verses in Proverbs, and one passage in Hebrews 12:5-8. The passage in Heb. 12:5-8 holds together the pro-spanking argument. However, the passage in Heb. 12:5-8 does not even refer to earthly parenting.

God's Word is stated in Hebrews 12:5-8 KJV:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons, for what son is he for whom the father chastenth not? But if ye be without chastening, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards and not sons.

When interpreted correctly, this passage is comforting to me. The Greek root word translated "scourgeth" is μαστιγόω (Latin: mastigoó) and has a figurative meaning to it. Whenever you got home after a long days work, you instead said "God whipped me hard today". This is rod language, with the rod of correction being used figuratively as a metaphor for enduring all odds. The modern way to put this passage is "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". 

God whips His children, like only He can, sending trials and tribulations the way of the believer. However, God only whips His children when it doesn't harm then, whereas earthly parents only whips their children when it does harm them. Due to the flawed nature of earthly parents, earthly parents were instead to parent as comes naturally, meaning attachment parenting. This passage is not an earthly father disciplining his children. However, the Bible does touch on the topic of parenting. See Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This word ultimately refers to a secure attachment between parent and child in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children just as they would to God, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return. See also Matt. 22:35-40, 25:31-46.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. The parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents in the parish at Ephesus who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children during his time as a deacon.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers here to melding the countenance of children gently, in a way that strengthens. In the Hebraic context, this could only mean one thing - lavish praise and encouragement when children were caught in the act of good behavior, using statements such as "keep headed down the straight path". Children learned good traits by way of the Christian example of parents. However, this example was backed up by way of praise and encouragement, as opposed to punishment or force. This praise led to children centering their countenance. Children also need religious instruction, as religion is a human need for children and adults alike. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to self-directed religious instruction. This religious instruction started with fathers leaving out a Bible for children to discover and explore. When children were caught in the act of studying the Bible, they were given lavish praise and encouragement with statements such as "that book is good for you". From there, religious instruction came in the form of question and answer, based off of what children saw in the text. Children were eager to learn the facts of life, with fathers being quick to give pointers on the context. This religious instruction ultimately is what led to a centered countenance in children.

Child punishment was not taken kindly to in biblical times. In the Early Church, children were instead caught in the act of good behavior, and were rewarded with praise of the same. After the initial praise was given, children worked hard to be good, then getting more praise in turn. This praise and encouragement led to a centered countenance on the part of a child.

Parents who punished their children were given a list of rebukes from different church parishioners. Then, the parents were righteously kidnapped and were put before a council of three elders. If the parents were convicted, children were allowed to run to a pedophile - known then as "child saviors" - for refuge. If the child wanted to leave the church with the parents, the pedophile was put under suspicion and investigated by church authorities. Child saviors in the Early Church acted out of charity, not a barter system. 

All of the biblical writers were anti-spanking, and opposed punitive parenting in their secular. writings. Even in King Solomon was against minor children being whipped. The seven passages in Proverbs discussing the rod refer to the 40 minus 1 lashes, with even King Solomon himself recommending attachment parenting in his secular writings.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand,