Christian attachment parenting: Why true Christian parenting is attachment parenting

Many parents in America think that punishment is the core of American parenting. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Today, the normative parenting is time-out, with an occasional disciplinary spanking "out of love". Most parents use the Bible as an excuse for punishing or being controlling with their children. However, the Bible commands no such thing. Christian attachment parenting is attachment parenting based off of the Early Christian context.

Christian attachment parenting is summed up by the doctrine of mutual submission. See Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. Parents are the enemy of children, just as mankind is the enemy God, and are to submit as such. This surrender to parents came with strings attached on the part of the parent, with the child issuing righteous demands to parents, usually when parents weren't pulling their weight in the family home.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christians in the parish at Ephesus who brought their pagan custom of spanking  and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul sure may have not gotten along with the women of the church, but he sure loved children, and took in a few orphaned children. Indeed, Greco-Roman fathers used the scourge of cords to punish their children, but NOT the Christians among them - the Early Christians were hated largely because they were "too soft" on their children.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to here, in this context, modeling and encouraging Christian discipline in children. The Christian standard of discipline in deserving of absolutely nothing, therefore grateful for absolutely everything, coming from a sinful nature, leading up to a chastened up example for children to follow. Christian parents in the Early Church centered their entitlement in view of their children, and then their children followed in their footsteps. Children, in biblical times, were caught being good, instead of being caught being bad. Whenever a child was caught emulating the Christian example of parents, they were lavishly praised and encouraged to "keep headed down the straight path". Boys were given manly praise when fathers caught them being good, whereas girls were given snuggles and physical affection when fathers caught them being good. Sometimes, children needed direct instruction from their parents. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to the advice and counsel of parents, meaning that parents could only give advice when needed, or else counsel their children when upset. Otherwise, children had divine authority over their parents, and had the authority to issue lawful orders, with parents having no such authority over their children.

Children need nurturing. Fathers nurture from afar, whereas mothers nurture up close. For the first 6 years of a child's life, children were in constant closeness with mothers, meaning that wherever the mother went, so did the child. The Early Christians practiced birth nudity, where mother and child were quartered next to each other, in skin-on-skin closeness and intimacy. Whenever children cried or were upset, mothers cooed at the child before picking them up, and then holding the child close to her bosom in skin-on-skin mammary closeness. Ordinary gentle parenting advice says to kneel down to the child. However, in biblical times, the child was picked up and held next to the bosom of mothers, perhaps being breastfed to sleep if milk-hungry. When out and about in public, mothers swaddled their children next to their children in swaddling blankets. Come nightfall, children co-slept next to mothers in skin-on-skin format. Children co-slept next to mothers until the onset of puberty, which was when children wanted their own place to sleep.

Christian attachment parenting is a tradition in this country. Christian attachment parenting is attachment parenting based off of the Early Christian context. What stands out among the other attachment parenting contexts is the necessity of discipline in the family home. When children were around age 6, a Bible was left out for the child to hopefully read and explore. When children were caught reading a Bible, they were given lavish praise and encouragement. From there, religion was a constant discussion between fathers and children, with children being eager to learn, and fathers giving pointers about the context.

Christian attachment parenting predates Christianity by thousands of years, and was used in the Old Testament as well. Our society gleans from the Bible and its context for wisdom as to how society should be run, including how children should be raised. Thus, since the Bible and its context is attachment parenting in nature, so should our parenting today in this country.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them forever be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!