Righteous parent abuse: How to handle bipolar rage attacks in children

Some parents have to deal with this cold hard fact. Their child has bipolar disorder. Childhood bipolar disorder is where either the child alternates between a depressed and a manic mood, or else is only manic. I had the disorder as a child, with the disorder instead being treated with psychotropic medication. The right medication - lithium carbonate - was life-changing. However, it took a long time for my parents to find the right medication for me, and thus I was abused in the mean time by way of behavioral intervention.

There is a right way to deal with a child with bipolar disorder. The righteous acronym from the Early Church at play here is righteous parent abuse. Righteous parent abuse states that, sometimes, you as a parent have to take a beating from your child, due to the special needs of the child. Righteous parent abuse is part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul to lift up the customary law that commands a secure attachment between parents and children in the family home. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, expecting absolutely nothing in return.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings.

Righteous parent abuse is the point where you give up the fight with your child with bipolar disorder, and give in to their demands. In the Early Church, parents had no legal recourse if their child was aggressive or violent. If a parent took their dependent child to court for the abuse imposed on to the parent, the court always took the side of the child. The parent was forced to apologize to the child before the council of 3 elders, or else be excommunicated for perjury - children were seen in biblical times as sacrosanct, meaning they could do no wrong, even if they did technically legally do things that were considered wrong. Children, however, could issue lawfully binding orders to parents, with parents, in most cases, being lawfully required to obey their children. When children physically battered their parents, they were seen as advocating a need, the best way they knew how.

One strategy parents used to defend themselves from the wrath of strong-willed children was crying. In the Early Christian context, whenever a child physically attacked or verbally berated a parent, parents did not become defensive. Instead, parents cried when being mistreated by their children. This reaction led to the child trying to sap up the situation, and actually deterred future abuse from the child. The way it worked then was that when children got angry with parents enough to hit them, the parent was not firm or stern in response. Instead, the parents cried. This causes children to snap out of their rage attacks, and reassure their parent while still in tears themselves. It ended up with parent and child crying next to each other.

"Benign" deprivation is a common parenting tactic in punitive authoritative homes like where I grew up in. This is where parents say "no" regularly because the child "needs" to hear the word "no". In the Early Church, parents were forbidden from saying "no" except in the most exigent of circumstances, such as if the word "no" was due to a command from a child that was unlawful and/or unworkable. All instances of a declination from parents required reassurance from a parent, which included crying with the child when the child struck out at parents. With bipolar rage attacks, the word "no" is a common trigger. The key is to avoid the word "no" at all costs, whenever possible. An example from my childhood is that I got a BB gun from my father for Christmas. He knew the truth - I'd be afraid to use it, out of caution. Children with bipolar disorder want to start a good project, but stop half-way towards the finish line. So, buy them whatever they want. When you have to say "no", expect a beating until your child is completely stabilized by medication.

Childhood bipolar disorder is a common mental health disorder in children, usually secondary to a developmental disorder such as autism. There is no way to remedy rebellious bipolar behavior but by medication, and medication of the right stand. Lithium carbonate is the gold standard for treating bipolar disorder. However, most child psychiatrists and developmental pediatricians don't recommend lithium treatment until late in adolescence.

I myself have the disorder, though it is completely in remission. Everyone around me as a child, when the disorder was active, was blaming the autism and punishing me for behaviors I couldn't help. As a young child, I was put in time-out and given a disciplinary spanking. A disciplinary spanking is only a few swats, but it is sudden due to the calm demeanor of the perpetrator. Regardless of my behaviors, I did not deserve to be punished. The goal of parenting for a child with bipolar disorder, before landing with the right medication, is keeping them safe, and otherwise tolerating their behaviors. Having bipolar disorder in a punitive parenting society is like being controlled on all sides. When adults weren't controlling of my behaviors, I was just fine. Now, I want back at my abuser, which is all parents, and all parents by extension. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them forever be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which  is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which ss the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!