"Terrible twos": How to avoid this stage using Christian attachment parenting

Most every parent has had to deal with it for a little while. This period of childhood is colloquially called the "terrible twos", and it usually lasts for conventional parents until age 6. Most parents take this stage for granted - and then punish their children for throwing temper tantrums. The fact of the matter is that the "terrible twos" don't need to happen. There are ways to pacify children that allow for secure attachment. Christian attachment parenting is the way to raise a child, including the way to bring up a 2-year-old.

The solution to the "terrible twos" is mutual submission between mother and child, where the child rests in the sustaining warmth of mothers, with mothers providing said warmth. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children just as they would to God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the wake of parent submission. Parents are to submit to their children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, revering and fearing children as vulnerable extensions of God.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his writings.

The "terrible twos" are an unfortunate installment of the American childhood. It also is an unfortunate symptom of the lack of attachment that parents have for children in this country. You can see it in many stores and other public establishments across the country - a 2-year-old kicking and screaming on the mall floor. Parenting was more attached in biblical times.

Most 2-year-olds were in constant closeness to mothers. A 2-year-old was usually still breastfeeding, suckling off the teat of mothers. A 2-year-old was constantly in the loving arms of mothers, being nourished and sustained to health. The Early Christians practiced birth nudity, meaning that mothers and children were naked next to each other, in skin-on-skin closeness and warmth. A 2-year-old was practically a baby in that culture.

When out and about, mothers swaddled up their 2-year-olds next to their bosom in swaddling blankets. From there, the 2-year-old fell limp, crying quietly when in need of loving attention. Mothers swaddled their children by tying a swaddling blanket made of velvet to their left breast, then across the dot to her right leg, or vice versa, or both in the case of twins. The child was comfortably tucked under the mother's loose, revealing dress for the purpose of swaddling and bonding. 

Time-in was a biblical practice, but the key to practicing time-in the biblical way is not to allow a child to spend time in a "calming corner", but in the form of skin-on-skin warmth and sustenance. When parents receive skin-on-skin contact from their children, they too calm down, and relax, in a way that feels natural, and then from there comes natural to the mother.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them forever be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices1 Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!