Righteous parent abuse: Understanding the reality of bipolar disorder

Many parents think that they are deserving of some things from their child. The concept of child-to-parent aggression has been referred to as a form of parental abuse committed by children. Most parents don't want to be beaten by their child. But, what can I say as an adult? Some blows were meant to be endured. Righteous parent abuse is when a minor or dependent child abuses a parent, physically or otherwise, and in such cases, the Bible - when understood in context - says that parents need to take a good beating from their children, now and then. Bipolar disorder existed in biblical times, and such children were held in high honor for their boldness and willfulness. 

Righteous parent abuse is really an acronym for the child, but for the parent to note, as a part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. Children are to rest in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children just as they would to God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the wake of the submission of parents. Parents are to submit to their children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, revering and fearing children as extensions of God.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slighrest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his writings.

Childhood bipolar disorder is a mood disorder where the child alternates between depression and mania, or else is always manic. Also prevalent among children with bipolar disorder is rage attacks. Rage attacks usually happen during a mixed episode. Usually, in children, bipolar rage attacks are triggered by the word "no". I have the disorder in remission, and was actively bipolar with oppositional-defiant traits as a child. The word "no" was earth-shattering, like it was the end of the world. I just had to have what I wanted, or else the world was going to end. What was worse? My parents then believed in "benign" deprivation, meaning they believed that I needed to hear the word "no" to "prepare him for the real world". I was put in time-out and punished phyically as well, and when I was placed in my room, I broke the door with my rageful kicking and anger.

In the Early Church, some children, who rejected the warmth of mothers from early on, were seen as stand-beside-me children. Stand-beside-me children stood beside the mother at all times. While standing beside their mother, they could hit, kick, or even bite their mothers. Such children were deemed to simply need space to be themselves. Many times, when children wanted something, and mothers had to say "no" to an order that was unworkable or immoral in nature, children would beat their children. Parents took it vulnerably, bursting into tears after being rejected by their child time and time again. Stand-beside-me children were high-energy children, and didn't want to be confined to swaddling blankets when out and about. They could run around a bit, but had to remain within the line of sight of parents.

Children who were stand-beside-me children were held in high honor. Children in biblical times were valued for their boldness and willfulness. This boldness and rebelliousness brought parents into full and dutiful submission to children. Parents with stand-beside-me children sometimes had to take a beating from children when setting limits with them, and parents took the beating vulnerably and meekly, toppling over to their child's demands.

Children, in biblical times, held lawful authority over their parents. Children could sue their parents in open court if they perceived offense from how they were treated by parents. But, parents had no right to sue in return, and had no lawful authority over their children. Parents were seen as bondservants towards their children, working towards a lump sum which was the independence of their children. Even if the child was beating up the parents, parents had no legal recourse for the violent behaviors of their children. Whenever a parent took their child to court, without exception, the church elders took the side of the child, and even forced the parent to apologize, to the child for challenging his/her authority, and to the elders for wasting their time. Sometimes, the church elders advised the parent abruptly, "you just have to take the blows from your child". 

Usually, it was stand-beside-me children that were aggressive and violent, usually when hearing the word "no". Striking parents was only unlawful for adults living away from home, and when the children were minor and/or care-dependent, the Law saw it as understandable aggression from a child. One thing Christian parents in the 1st Century used in their immediate defende was tears, which shut off the rage attack immediately. Crying in parents didn't cause the child to take advantage of the parent, but set a limit gently that the parent had enough of being beaten. Usually, children then switched to tears themselves. But, sometimes, parents had to take it in full.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!