Respect: Why parents must earn their respect in relation to children

Many parents think that they have the right to demand respect from children. This is a common attitude towards children by American parents. Most American parents demand respect from children, and back up those demands with punishment. The most common form of punishment in America for children currently is time-out, sometimes accompanied by a disciplinary spanking in quite a few homes. The fact of the matter is that respect is earned in life, including in parenting.

Respect for children is based off of the doctrine of mutual submission. The Fifth Commandment is repeated in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the love and grace of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children as they would to God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Parents are to submit to children as their enemy, from beneath yet from above, revering and fearing children as vulnerable extensions of God.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times was seen as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating them as a quartered slave.

Children, in biblical times, wore absolutely no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude in order to serve both their husbands and their children, separately. Mothers served their children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely attachment parenting items such as breastfeeding and skin-on-skin comfort. Children up until age 6 did not leave the side of mothers, usually ranging besides mothers when at home, sometimes clinging to them when crying or upset. Crying or upset children were held in skin-on-skin comfort, and reassured "this too will pass". By night, mothers co-slept with children in skin-on-skin format in order to forge a secure attachment, and to protect children from all predatory threats, including the sexual entitlement of fathers. Fathers also formed a secure attachment with their children, by way of witnessing skin-on-skin bonding between mother and child, wanting in on the action through forming a sexual attachment to the child, and imprinting on the child through masturbatory orgasm. Daughters in particular were attracted to fathers, usually wanting to look attractive to fathers. Parents turned down the sexual affections of their children, and redirected them to masturbation. Actual child sexual abuse in biblical times was rare next to non-existent, and was severely punished in both the Old and New Testament. Child sexual abuse was punishable in the Early Church by way of excommunication, without chance of the parish forgiving you. 

Respect for parents was a concept in biblical times. But, respect was defined under biblical law as closeness and intimacy, not fear of punishment. Children were usually close to their parents both physically and emotionally, ranging right beside parents, sometimes clinging to mothers. Mothers were the primary caregivers of children, and stayed home with the children, breastfeeding the milk-dependent children, feeding milk-independent children solid foods cooked fresh by mom. When out and about, children were wrapped up next to the bosom of mothers in swaddling blankets, suckling her teat when milk-hungry, otherwise being wrapped up in peace with the world and with mom. Respect for parents meant remaining close to parents. You could yell at mom, you could swear at mom, and you could even hit mom, and as long as that was due to closneess and vulnerable trust, it was seen as a sign of respect. The way it was seen was as a complement to the mother, as no child is that emotional with an adult they don't trust. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!