What is a criminal?: Why punitive parenting contributes to our crime problem as a nation

Many parents think that not punishing their child will cause them to become a criminal. The argument is that if you don't create structure for children, they will grow up having no structure, and then will want to become criminals and cross society's boundaries. The fact of the matter is, however, that punitive parenting leads to criminality, and doesn't prevent it. Only attachment parenting, the biblical way, will prevent it.

What is a criminal? An individual who needs punishment and rewards to behave in a peaceable and orderly manner in society. Many criminals commit crimes just so they can go back to prison, claiming that they need structure, and that the only structure they can find is in prison. Why is this? Well, they are dependent on being controlled in order to do the right thing, and so when the control is lifted, they do the wrong thing. Lack of punishment in a home actually builds moral internalization, as children are not reliant on being punished or rewarded in order to form their own moral values - they just absorb good morals from their parents. Anyone is capable of committing a crime. That doesn't mean everyone will. This is because most everyone was punished and controlled as a child, and so, in certain situations, anyone could slip if there is no accountability to keep them in check. 

Children need a different form of discipline than they receive today. They need a form of discipline that only attachment parenting can provide. It says in Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother, for this is the first commandment with a promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long upon the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children as they would God, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Children are to rest safely and securely in the presence of parents, trusting parents in all things, following mothers around especially like a gosling to a mother goose. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments or controlling demeanor towards a child. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up this legal context in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, wss anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

The Greek root word translated "nurture" is παιδεία (Latin: paideia) and refers to non-entitlement to the level of undeservingness. Discipline, in the Bible, is the attitude that one is deserving of absolutely nothing, and thus grateful for absolutely everything, leading to a chastened up example for children to follow. The nurture of the Lord involves parents imparting a Christ-like example for children to follow, with children emulating it, in a securely attached environment where children are encouraged to want to be like their parents. The idea is to not find fault in your child, but find fault in yourself, being convicted of having this fault in yourself. A good place to start is parent anger. Then, declare yourself a depraved and decadent sinner merely for existing with the sin nature that you have. You will feel worthless at first, but that worthless feeling will prompt you to work on your own faults as a parent, including your anger, turning your parent anger inward facing. Children will see this in a securely attached environment, and will do the same mental work with themselves in the Lord.

Attachment parenting, in the context of righteous learning and discipline, involves children having a safe place to absorb the Judeo-Christian values of Christian parents, at their own pace, on their own terms. Children do not need good morals beaten into them. All they need is a loving, moral example to look up to, and nourishment and sustenance to win them over to the values of their children. The idea is that, when children cry, don't punish them. Instead, if you are their mother, hold them close to your bosom, and perhaps allow them to breastfeed if they are still milk-dependent. Allowing children this nourishment and sustaining warmth encourages children, on their own, to explore the values of their parents, and absorb those good moral values as they will, on their own, at their own pace. This is what was done in biblical times.

When children are instead punished by enduring being spanked, put in false imprisonment (time-out), or have privileges or movement restricted, they simply learn how not to be punished, and then hide their immoral side away from their parents. This also makes them dependent on punishment in order to morally reason, meaning they cannot think for themselves as moral individuals, rendering them immoral individuals. When people need to be controlled in order to behave, they end up committing crimes, usually when there is no control or accountability to coddle them. When nobody is looking, everyone is a criminal. 

Mankind is born with a depraved and decadent sin nature, and is deserving of absolutely nothing but DEATH and PUNISHMENT merely for existing in relation to God. Human beings are capable of anything, under the right/wrong conditions. Thus, human beings need self-control and self-discipline, in order to stay away from the temptation of criminal activity. Human beings don't need to be controlled by anyone, as human beings are the master of their own choices. When there is nobody controlling you, and you don't have self-control, who is going to stop you from committing a crime? The police, perhaps, but what if the police aren't looking? Are you going to steal that loaf of bread at the self-checkout line because your family needs to eat, or are you going to get a job?

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!