Why not to use Santa Claus as a behavioral motivator this Christmas season

It is Christmastime once more. Many children around the world are anticipating the arrival of Santa Claus. However, many children are also struggling with fears about their behavior. These children are probably wondering "will Santa bring me what I want, or will I get a bucket of coal". This Christmas season should not be used as a means to sculpt the perfect child that does not exist. No child is perfect, as every child makes mistakes. At the same time, they are at an age and developmental level where they are not responsible for their mistakes, no matter how big or small.

I personally am convicted, under my Christian faith, to shun Santa Claus altogether. Santa Claus is the exact replicate of the Norse god Odin. I respect if you feel otherwise about Santa Claus, as Santa-belief is not a mortal form of idolatry. However, I am personally convicted that it is idolatry. Also, Santa is often used as a behavioral motivator to scare children into being good beyond their years.

Child punishment, and punitive parenting of any kind, is dealt with explicitly in the Bible. It says in Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, coming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and was understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment in biblical times was seen as holding your child hostage merely for doing the wrong thing. Paul here was lifting up this legal context in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishment into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

The abovementioned moral statute also applies to threatening children, in which case threatening children with Santa is a moral crime. Same with threatening to take gifts back when children are "ungrateful" for them. The Apostle Paul was the foremost child advocate of his time, speaking from his pulpit about the sins of the Greek and Roman pagans who spanked their daughters and whipped their sons with the cat o' nine tails.

Children are not perfect little angels all the time, nor do they have the capacity to be. Children have clinical entitlement, meaning entitlement that is not a moral or salvational issue. The Greek root word denoting entitlement in the New Testament is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers to, officially speaking, want, to the point of imposition. Children are not liable to the court for this entitlement, as in biblical times, children were seen as sacrosanct in terms of righteous judgment. Children, unlike adults, cannot control their wants, and so we excuse them for not being able to control their wants. When children have a secure attachment and a good Christian example, they do the work to center their entitlement, and they do it automatically, without the need of punishments or controlling demeanor from parents. Child entitlement is a struggling entitlement, meaning children are naturally motivated to have a change of heart, if they have a good Christian example to work towards at home. All children need to work towards a good Christian example is a secure attachment to parents, where children have a safe place to work on their entitlement issues. Children absorb the Christian family values of their parents on their own, and don't need an elf on the shelf to motivate them, nor a belt on the shelf.

Most of the childish behaviors that annoy parents, and are seen as misbehavior by parents, are actually developmentally appropriate behaviors given the age and developmental level that they are at. Children naturally develop on their own, as their brain capacity grows. All a child needs to thrive is a good Christian example and a secure attachment. Once they have all that, the rest of the work will be done by them. Children naturally want to be independent, and thus all a parent needs to do is be self-reliant, disciplined, and non-entitled in their example, and their child will absorb those values automatically.

Gifts, from the vantage-point of the giver, come without strings attached. Giving a gift is the ultimate act of love to a child. True Christian love is denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao) and refers to giving without receiving, meaning, in full, prioritizing children first, and yourself as a parent last, to the point of submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return, valuing children as extensions of God. If it is really a gift to your child, from you, you are to expect nothing in return from them. Children do not have to behave perfectly to get a gift. A gift is something you did nothing to receive. Children are grateful in their own way.

Even if the threat is an empty threat "just to motivate them", just as was the case with my abusive parents, it can cause fear and upset of the discomfiting type in children. Children then second guess their own natural behaviors. They count the ticks on themselves, and this leads to children engaging in behaviors such as staying up all night. My parents only gave me coal for Christmas when I asked for it (yes, I was a weird kid). My parents simply wanted to motivate me, but usually were motivating in a controlling and punitive way, in a warm and cold manner that simply bred anger in me. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast in to the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend in to the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!