How to teach Judeo-Christian family values to your children - without spanking or punishment

Many parents want to teach to their children Judeo-Christian family values. This is a common wish for parents in America. America is a nation founded on Judeo-Christian family values, and thus we should always be teaching good values to children. However, punitive parenting is not the best way to teach Judeo-Christian family values. Christian attachment parenting is the way to teach good values to children.

The good Judeo-Christian values that our great nation was founded on can be summed up by the avoidance of one word in the Greek-English language. The Greek root word denoting entitlement in the New Testament, and cross-referencing the Tenth Commandment, is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers to, officially speaking, want, to the point of imposition. Unofficially speaking, the concept of entitlement refers to the slightest of unattainable want. It is not good to want anything in life, as want is the core of our depraved and decadent sin nature. However, since we all want things at least some of the time, we should ask politely and appropriately for what we want, accepting "no" as an answer. When a want will lead to a temper tantrum, stifle that want and avoid it at all costs. Children are watching your every move as a parent, and so it is good to be disciplined and non-entitled in relation to children, in order to show them the way.

Teaching good values to your children requires a good Christian example for children to follow. However, every good example should be backed up by something. Punitive parenting such as spanking and punishment only drives children away from the values of their parents, as children who are punished and treated in a controlling demeanor growing up develop resentment and rebellion against their parents. Attachment parenting is the only true way to pass down good Judeo-Christian family values. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, sacrificing for their children, just as Christ Sacrificed for His children, with children being a Godhead for parents to serve, and with children resting in the submission of parents, owing absolutely nothing in relation to parents. Parents are depraved and decadent sinners who are deserving of absolutely nothing, from their children or anyone else. Respect in parenting is to be earned, with parents bearing the burden of proof in terms of a mutual submission relationship with their children.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, coming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards a child. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment in biblical times was seen as holding a child hostage merely for things they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up this legal context to a group of Greek Christians who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular belief, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

Attachment parenting was the norm in biblical times. The Early Christians, as well as their Jewish predecessors, used a specific and distinct type of attachment parenting that deified children. Children were worshipped and venerated as extensions of God, with children being seen then as being called by God to convict all mankind of his charitable side. The topic of children, for the Early Christians, was a sobering and convicting topic. Children were installments of God, who were installed by God to bring out the charity in adults, then judge it. Children issued lawful and binding orders then as to what they wanted and needed by crying or whining. Children could take their parents to court, and by the time it got to the church elders, the case was already decided in favor of the child. Children got much of what they wanted, and everything they needed, having much lobbying power in relation to parents and other adults.

Children, in biblical times, wore no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude, in order to serve their husbands and their children, separately. Mothers served children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely breastmilk (until age 3) and skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy. The core of Christian attachment parenting is skin-on-skin co-sleeping, with mother and child being fast asleep in the nude, and children soaking up the rays of skin-to-skin contact. Children went naked in biblical times for a specific reason - so mothers could easily snuggle them up and cuddle them up when they were crying or upset, with the skin-on-skin element of the mother-child interaction reassuring the child quickly. For the first six years of childhood, time with children was to be spent together. For the last six years of childhood, time with children was to be spent apart, with fathers lovingly encouraging bold feats of independence. "Last six years" today refers to the teen years, meaning instead of trying to force a bond that is naturally severing, parents should loudly and lavishly encourage bold feats of independence in children. The goal of biblical parenting was independence, not slavish obedience to authority.

Attachment parenting can be used as a tool to teach any values system to children, including good Judeo-Christian family values. When parents use attachment parenting instead of punitive parenting, children want to be like their parents. When parents are role models for our founding Judeo-Christian family values, children absorb the values like a sponge. There is no need to punish children to back up a good Christian example. Just pamper them with attachment parenting to back it up, and you create a safe place where they can learn good values without fear of punishment. Punishment discourages children from learning good family values, whereas attachment parenting allows them to safely absorb the values of their parents.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!