Co-sleeping: Why co-sleeping is beneficial for a secure parent-child bond

Many parents think that co-sleeping is the irresponsible parenting choice. Most American parents are opposed to co-sleeping, with the most compelling arguments coming from medical professionals concerning "sleep dependence". The fact of the matter is that co-sleeping is necessary for a secure attachment, meaning a secure parent-child bond with children. The Bible commands that parents have a secure attachment with their children.

The Bible commands a secure attachment with children on the part of parents primarily. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to be extensions of Christ in the family home, dutifully and selflessly submitting to children as they would God, with children resting safely and securely in the submission of parents. Children are to rest in the presence of parents, following them around like goslings to a mother goose. The word "obey", in the biblical Greek, refers to secure attachment.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including any punishments or controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up this legal context to a group of a Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child.

It is common knowledge that children aged 2-6 refuse to go to bed at night, meaning refuse to go to their room to go to bed on their own. Many parents simply chalk it up to defiance, and punish their children for not going to bed on their own. The fact of the matter is that children are not ready to go to bed on their own at that age. Children have a primal fear, at that age, of being preyed upon by predators, and thus they crave the closeness of mothers to safely fall asleep. Most parents would argue that we don't live in ancient times, where predators could devour a child. However, predators exist even today that could devour a child - sexual predators. Co-sleeping does not encourage sexual predation against children because the mother is right there, and chances are the mother is not going to let it happen. Most child sexual abuse is committed by a father or father figure in the home, when the child is isolated in their own room at night. Biblical fathers in the Bible had a sex drive for their child, in which the good fathers masturbated to thoughts of the child. But also, the mother protected her children by sleeping next to them at night, so that fathers could not sexually attack them at night. 

Many parents, as well as medical professionals serving children, argue that co-sleeping leads to "sleep dependence", especially in the case of children with autism. This is a common argument against co-sleeping. However, psychohistory and evolutionary psychology say something very different about co-sleeping. In biblical times, children who slept next to their mothers shook off their parents at some point in their childhood, meaning asserted their independence and slept in their own area of the house. This was the first big milestone in a child's development. The goal of parenting in biblical times was independence, not obedience. Some children simply develop slower than others, but eventually, most everyone with autism will seek out sleeping on their own, on their own. 

Children, in biblical times, wore absolutely no clothing, at all, until they became adults. Women only wore clothing outside the home, and otherwise went in the nude, in order to serve their husbands and their children, separately. Mothers served their children by way of providing for them nourishment and sustenance, namely breastmilk (until age 3) and skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy. The core aspect of Christian attachment parenting in the 1st Century was skin-on-skin co-sleeping, with mother and child fast asleep next to each other, with the child soaking up the rays of skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy. Children went naked for a specific reason - so mothers could snuggle them up and cuddle them up when they were crying or upset. Fathers also formed a secure attachment when they stood by and saw the mother-child bond form. However, the secure attachment between father and child - especially father-daughter attachment - was sexual in nature. Deacons and elders in the Early Church instructed fathers to follow their sexual thoughts about their children to the end through masturbatory fantasy. Usually, the fantasy subsided, but the father grew closer to the daughter. Sexual abuse occurred then rarely, and only when fathers neglected their personal responsibility towards their sexual attachment towards their child, and refused to masturbate to thoughts of their children. That is where mothers came in, and slept next to children to guard them from the sexual entitlement of their fathers. The ancients did have a concept of child sexual abuse, and saw it as any sexual relations with someone under the age of majority, and it was seen as deserving of death. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be forever cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!