The traditions of attachment parenting: Why the Bible commands attachment parenting

Many parents think that our traditions as a country include punishing or being controlling with children. This is a common mistake parents make. Much of our normative parenting as a country is based on false doctrine and false interpretation of the Bible. America is a Christian nation, and the Bible commands attachment parenting.

It says in Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. Children are to rest securely in the sacrifice of parents, just as parent believers rest securely in the Sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Parents are to ensure that children have a warm and loving childhood, winning over the respect and affection of children. When attachment parenting is used to the fullest in Christian parenting, including in terms of skin-on-skin comforting strategies, children listen to parents, and do so automatically and out of instinct. Obedience, in the biblical tense, is not something you force onto a child, but instead a willful choice on the part of a child to surrender to parents, in response to a child's cup being filled to the top with their every vulnerable need. When that cup is filled up, a child does not question the motives of parents, but instead blindly goes along with what parents say or do, following parents wherever they go. This verse lifts up the customary laws that parents followed in biblical times, with these customary laws commanding that parents use attachment parenting. This verse was a reminder to the Colossians to stay on the attachment parenting path.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, coming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all punitive parenting, including any punishment or controlling demeanor towards a child. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children too many times, and after receiving many warnings that their punitive parenting habits were in violation of the Law. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined under the Law as the slightest of damage or offense stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen then as holding a child hostage merely for what they did wrong. Paul here was lifting up this Law to a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any punishment of a child. Paul here was advocating for children in Greek and Roman Christian homes who were being spanked and whipped for any little behavior that parents deemed "impurity". No such custom existed among the Early Christians, with the Early Christian parenting traditions involving attachment parenting.

Mothers, in biblical times, were the adults primarily charged in the care and protection of children. Mothers then did not spank or punish children in order to gain cooperation from them. Instead, they used skin-on-skin comforting strategies in order to gain the cooperation of their children. Children never wore any clothing, at all, until they were an adult. Mothers only wore clothing when outside the home, and otherwise wore no clothing. Children snuggled with mothers, engaging in mammary closeness, with the child held close to the bosom, being reassured by close contact with mothers. Fathers also nurtured, every once in a while, only gaining access to the children with the mother's permission.

The result? Children never left the side of mothers until age 6, and even when they left her side, they didn't stray at all from the line of sight of parents. Respect for parents was a concept in biblical times, but that respect was based off of closeness to parents, not fear of punishment from parents. Parents in biblical times aimed to form a close and secure bond with their children, and used that bond to gain cooperation from their children.

Parent anger was not accepted in biblical times, except in ceremonial form as a means to protect a child from an interloper. Parents who even showed anger towards their children, openly or in private, were seen as vipers and monsters who preyed upon children with their parental entitlement. Anger towards a child was seen as predatory, in the worst of ways, and in and of itself provoked outrage throughout the child victim's community. Parents were instead motivated by righteous anxiety and worry, meaning parents simply worried about their child doing something wrong or unsafe.

Attachment parenting is a part of our traditions as a country. The Bible is our main source of wisdom and inspiration, as we glean from the Bible and its context as a country. The Bible supports the use of attachment parenting, as that was the way of the ancients. We as a country should follow the lead of the good parents in the biblical context, and raise our children in an attached manner.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever in to the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!