Skin-to-skin closeness: Why this is strongly recommended in the Bible

Many parents think that the best way to gain cooperation from your child is punishment and controlling measures. This is a common mistake that parents make, usually motivated by false and abusive religious teachings. The fact of the matter is that children need a secure parent-child bond, and with that bond comes bonding time, which usually is skin-to-skin in terms of expression.

The centerpiece of an attached Christian parenting relationship is Christian love, as denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao). This refers to Christian Agape love, which is prioritizing children first, and yourself as a parent last, in a convicted way leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return, with children resting safely and securely in the good works of parents, not having to work for the love of parents, and instead resting in it. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. This form of respect for parents does not come from fearful compliance, but instead comes from restful trust in parents, with children telling parents anything and everything that is on their mind, including admissions of wrongdoing or non-conforming traits, expecting absolutely no punishment or reprisal in return. In this sort of loving and affirming environment, children usually follow the example of children. This almost never happens right away, as children engage in childish behaviors, usually those that indicate poor emotional control inherent of their immature age and development. Children usually take after their parents, and follow their example, after attaining young adulthood. Before then, children in biblical times rebelled, and that kind of rebellion was to be expected.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely child abuse in this context. Child abuse, under biblical law, at minimum, is defined as the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by the child, coming from entitlement. In this commandment, the Apostle Paul was lifting up the Law against punishment and controlling demeanor against children, rebuking Greek Christian parents for bringing their pagan custom of spanking children into the church. Christian parents of Greek origin were misusing the book of Proverbs to justify their punishment habits even in the 1st Century, when this commandment was given. Paul was warning parents in the Colossian church that Proverbs is simply wisdom literature - a list of wise sayings - and not a parenting manual. The rod verses - all seven of them - refer to a ancient, archaic legal practice within Judaism, where the father was subpoenaed to issue 40 minus 1 lashes to his ADULT child after the offender was convicted of a capital offense. These whippings and executions were rare in the Old Testament, and non-existent in the New Testament. 

Children in biblical times went naked wherever they went, while under the supervision of parents at all times. Mothers were traditionally naked in the family home, in order to serve their husbands and children, separately. Children were served with a nice warm hug, and being allowed to range beside their mother, and being held close to the mother in swaddling blankets or a papoose bag if the mother wanted to run errands.

Skin-to-skin closeness, especially in complete nude format, lowers the level of attachment in parents, so that they can better relate to children, right on the child's level. It is an immature type of relating to children, closer to an older sibling than an authoritative parent, only that older sibling guides the child in the right direction, not the wrong direction (Prov. 22:6). Parents were immature in relation to their children, but in a guiding way. Think the "fun mom" stereotype - biblical mothers in particular were fun with their children to the umpteenth degree. Fathers were fun to play with as well - fathers addressed children on formal terms, in a deified fashion, until the child "broke the ice" and allowed for casual conversation and interaction, which usually was on the floor, in "building blocks" fashion, with the father being a human ragdoll suddenly interested in what the child is interested in (pro-social ragdoll). This setup prevented child sexual abuse - most men had parent attraction towards their own children. Children were usually with mothers, and never left her side for the first 6 years, largely to discourage sexual predation from fathers. Both parents then were fun to be around, with parents laughing at messes and mischief that the children caused. 

Parents then had no parent anger to punish children with, and this was due to skin-to-skin closeness in the case of mothers (and pedophilia self-awareness with fathers). Parents could be assertive, but usually, they found a nice way to say anything to their children, but they didn't get angry. Children laughed at their mishaps (think along the lines of drawing on the wall) and parents laughed alongside the children, then cleaned up the mess when the child wasn't around. It was immaturity in parents, but in a way that guided children towards God. 

The abovementioned context can be applied today if you are their mother, including the nudity part. Find some time to snuggle with your children when you get out of the shower. Another way is what we call a time-in, but in the attachment parenting form - how it was done in biblical times - where the mother held a crying child to her bosom, and then reassured the child of her presence. Some mothers wear a shirt with a plunging neckine in order to serve their child and not men, so that children have easy access to skin-to-skin comfort and closeness with mothers. Skin-to-skin closeness and intimacy is crucial to the optimal development of children.

The depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!